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31 August 2011

I wish I was a little nursing cover factory so that I could make one for all zillion entrants...
maybe one day I will be and I shall do just that

Today's winner not only wins the cover but also the (coveted) prize for sweetest and most frequent comments here at the Camp

lovely commenter #19
 {long blonde hair~middle left}
photo thieved from her blog

I don't know if a nursing cover win qualifies you for a congratulations
but I'll throw one out there just in case it does

Thank you all for playing and contributing and being the best readers in the universe...
or maybe just the world.

Have a pleasant night.


Leave a comment: 5 comments

On today's docket:

consume more water and less sugar

wolf fewer baked goods than yesterday and the day before

biting cessation education for a certain someone

to Costco for foil, soap (dish and body) and milk alternative

to library to face my bevy of late fines and rent the perfect tangible gem

(if time...clearly I'm a busy J. Cleaver)

deal with Lucy's rastafarianesque (Simon's word not mine) coat of curls


of course


If there are any stragglers that want to join the pool of few for a chance to score the nursing cover extraordinary

or forever hold your regret

I'll post the winner in a few short or long hours. 

semi dramatic exit 
{stage left}

31 weeks

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30 August 2011

Julia's nose has been a straight hydrant lately (not pictured, you're welcome). The kind of hydrant that constantly runs down her face and bubbles and smears. I blame the formula consumption and medicated birth. She is otherwise asymptomatic but its actually really gross and should stop me from taking her out in public because I am 100% positive that anyone without kids takes one look at her and thanks the heavens they don't have kids or is reaffirmed in their decision to not have kids. Sorry J. I only tell it like it truly is. 

Onto the other little angel.

This week I'm either suffering from some serious early onset dementia or pregnant brain. Maybe both. I drove to the store for the sole purpose of buying milk and came out with hot dogs, ice cream and graham cracker Goldfish (one of these items in bulk). I put my goods in the trunk, drove off with the trunk door ajar and wound up in a Home Depot parking lot very far from our house wondering why Lucy wasn't doing her usual bark greet. I then came home to unload the hot dogs into my bottom dresser drawer. I also cut my hair to nostril length to match Julia's style. . .just kidding. . .we've been letting Julia sleep with our sharpest pair of hair cutting scissors because she insists and we are softies so they were unavailable at the time of wanted said chop. 

There has also been a lot of growth this week...
{you can see my new layer of neck hair peeking out...side rat tail style-keeping it really real}
moreso than normal as I've even had to dip into someone else's wardrobe
just kidding again! He looks awful in puffy sleeves and stripes

I see that the boy or girl poll is neck and neck/fitty-fitty. 
We'll see who is correct in nineish short week. 

Hopefully not everyone. 

Now I'm going to make and eat this for dinner. I might share with Simon...I might not.

short sleeved and khaki

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29 August 2011

 Another Monday...another very minor project to share with you and yours. 
I found this short sleeved sweatshirt complete with decorative brass shoulder buttons (one side only...asymmetry for the W) and shoulder pads (extra thick) at the Goodwill recently
{if it looks like I just woke up...hopefully I did...I'm a tired lady}
 of course it wasn't as large as I had anticipated when I came home and put it on but the sleeves needed some serious slimming.
some minutes of sewing and braiding later...
with the help of my heavyweight rib cinch and ever stretched white jeans
we have a winner that will not be lasting until I am full on t-e-r-m...maybe post partum friendly...we'll see.

In other news: I'm over at DIY Maternity today (nothing you haven't seen before)
but check out these cools:
Maxi dress tutorial
fourth trimester skirt
reversible paper bag skirt


and a small Simon says:
Simon: did you send me those pictures?
Grace: what pictures?
Simon: you know...the ones where I'm being cute with Julia

and don't forget about the giveaway popularay!

See you soon.


Paul and Mawy

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28 August 2011

Good Afternoon
 Just popping in for more familial reportage. 
Its Sunday. 
Its appropriate. 

My brother Paul scored not one, not two, not three but f-o-u-r touchdowns in last night's football game
Go Paul. Go Huskies. 
Thank you Facebook for the photo.

We're lucky enough to have Julia's fairy Godmother and Aunt Mary
(same person)
coming for a little visit tonight
{not current}
 {current, pretty and pictured with also pretty bestie Meg who just got engaged (!!!!)}
thank you again, Facebook, for the photo

can't wait!!
maybe we won't.

Have a wonderful Sunday.
I know we have, are and will.


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27 August 2011

skip if you don't like whine. really. 

Simon is wrapping up a really great month of working weekend nights
 {photobooth debauchery}
(to be encored by a very generous helping of Labor Day weekend hours...Julia and I are free to lease for social events, gatherings, general revelry and conviviality ... we come cheap but we won't be separated ... sorry ... I'm clingy) on top of the obvious grueling weekday schedule and while I'd like to use run of the mill negativo adjectives such as, horrible, awful, terrible, awful, horrible etc...I'm going to go ahead and pull out my bigger guns and tell all you who care and are still reading that it has been a nightmare, a daymare and an overall loathsome experience. I'm insanely paranoid and convinced that sans man of the casa, we will be preyed upon, robbed, killed, worse...etc.  Lucy does a decent job guarding and protecting our honor but even she needs a few minutes of shut eye (singular) understandably as she is only canine. After a healthy night of obsessive lock checking, mediocre Hulu surfing and blog perusing, usually around 4 or 5 I am able to trick myself into a few five minute intervals of sleep but by the time Julia wakes up around 6 or 7... things get kind of ugly as Simon comes home and very understandably needs to crash after his crazy nights of baby catching, grumpy nurse dodging and barky attending avoiding. Julia is ready to carpe the pudding out of the diem and no amount of chocolate creamer can rouse any sort of seizing spirit in my tired woeful soul.  I may or may not be guilty of wasting prayers to beg if it might be too much to ask that Julia sit contently for the entirety of a 90+ minute age appropriate film while I try and catch up on some sleep. (almost done...promise...although I suspect I am now typing to an audience of um none) As my fatigue level rises, my Braxtons become more frequent, angry and lengthy which isn't a monstrous deal but just sort of an annoyance. 
Endddd long narrative complaint.
I feel better already. 

cleansing exhale

With that said (Chris Harrison style)... 
we have been making the most of our Sunday evenings after we've all sort of recovered from the long nights and nap happy days.

We've been packing unimpressive picnics to take to the biggest park on the planet followed by a nice walk and healthy dose of people watch/staring.
silver lining be mine and ours...not yours. 

sleep/wake tight.



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26 August 2011

I don't know why but after every OB appointment I always feel like I deserve a treat. A food treat. A sugary food treat. A fattycakes sugary food treat. And as the appointments get more and more frequent, the treat trips obviously have to follow suit. It doesn't matter if I weigh in at seven pounds heavier than my clock in the two weeks prior (which of course has never happened)...I still feel like I deserve something special. 

Today after I got home from my appointment I sat and thought about doughnuts that a certain reader had mentioned earlier this week and got right back in the car, drove to a local doughnut shop (as opposed to that foreign one down the way) and bought six doughnuts to split with Simon. I had four...he ate two. Fair. I still wasn't even kind of satisfied so I Googled, "how to make fatty doughnuts like a pro without shortening but with glaze out of milk but have soy milk". My fair Google answered swiftly and soundly and a few pretty hours later I had these...
 I know they don't look good to me now either

I sent some in with Simon for the night crew at the hospital. I suspected he would (understandably) leave their ugly selves in the car but he sent this photographic evidence that he indeed left them out...
 complete with foil gown still modestly draped

I think you're eyes are bleeding by now so I'll leave you alone for the time being.

oh I won't.
Julia, Simon and I did go to a new to us part of town today which was fun. A farmer's market complete with produce and produce and produce. 
 and a sign begging to be photographed by stereotypical p-a-r-e-n-t-s
(I think the van adds a nice splash of old fashioned class)

We didn't buy anything but we felt like green and responsible St. Louisans strolling through the fun
and for good measure a snap of Julia on the way home
1. stillllll working on independent bottle feeding
2. her omnipresent safety blanket in car: massive ice scraper
3. shielding drums from mom's Britney...or was it Lady Gaga?

and before I traipse off...some St. Louis lingo I've picked up:

a Sundae (as in ice cream) is not pronounced Sunday but actually Sun-duh. 


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25 August 2011


a giveaway.

get excited...I know we are


I know probably 1% of the audience will find this useful
{nursing coverlets/privacy hoods/other unattractive moniker}

but you might have a baby shower on your near or far docket and you might need a gift and the giftee would be so appreciative of a baby cloak and you could sit back, pat your untouched wallet, smile smugly and say to yourself, 
"it pays to read bad and vapid blogs...thanks Grace."
You could do that...if you enter and v-v-v-v-v-v-v--vin. 

prize features:
homemade (and it shows...I'm sorry)
terrycloth pocket for your trinkets that also 
d-d o-o u-u b-b l-l e-e s-s 
as a spit up mop
boning at the neck for easy viewing of the action underneath

your choice betwixt:
both house purple terrycloth pockets  
To Enter:
let me see how complicated I can make this
1. Follow Camp Patton and tell me which color you'd fancy
and provide me with your choice of
a. a book worth reading
b. a blog worth reading
c. a link to the recipe of a tasty freezable meal
 If you want to be wild and generous and leave three separate comments for three separate my enthusiastic guest!

Winner announced on Wednesday August 31, 2011
and one important items of business:
1. Congratulations to Steph!!! 

Good Luck mass of enterees 
(otherwise known as entrants)!! 


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24 August 2011

uh oh!

or if you're Simon
good oh (!)
{photos unrelated but snapped today so somewhat relevant ormaybenotatall}
Blame it on the grapes turned raisins in Julia's highchair or the five semi empty bags of flour hogging unorganized space in the pantry or the muffin batter crust cemented to the stove top...and I'll stop there before I scare you away f-o-r-e-v-e-r-r-r-r-r
but I have been very uncharacteristically struck with a never ever before deep desire to deep deep clean the house and truly...
 I exaggerateth not. 
 I'm not proud of this (one) minor flaw. 
Anyway...I think it is too early for nesting although there was nary a feather in sight before Julia arrived so maybe I'm making up for the time lost last time around
or maybe I'm just finally reading my trusty house whiff manual

I solicited Julia's help and she went at it guns blazing
in the opposite direction
(yes the majority of her toys consist of tangible junk mail
... she counts her blessings on a daily basis)
she lovey a good and fast drawer empty
mother's girl
she was a helpy little lady in the bathroom and cheered my scrubbing and sweating onward with some tight-lipped smiles
(not a piece of plastic feces on her head just a nice brown bow she found while sweeping under her sleeping cage...which she loves and will never remove)

so...lest the productive spirit understandably moves onto greener pastures...I'll be flitting about cleaning, brow dabbing and head scratching should you need me


as my mother, Bettina, would say...
"I got a wild hair"
and just might do an x-small to small giveaway tomorrow
I predict there will be two interested parties in the prize out of my whole wide readership
maybe fewer...we'll see.



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Some friends generously volunteered to watch Julia the other night so that Simon and I could go out to celebrate our big two year old marriage
{Simon minus Grace}
and while I was stuffing 18 sandwich bags with bits of hot dog and strawberries to accompany Julia to the kind volunteers' house Simon busied himself with his outfit deets 
and when he came out claiming to be ready to go
I was greeted with this fine sight
 I had no idea he was so fashionably astute
when I asked what on God's greenest earth he was doing he very seriously responded that he was merely copying the 'crew
and after one quick looksie-lou at the website
 I saw the light
I just hope he will pose like Mr. khaki and Keds on the left next time
 If a pack of pigs decides to flock and fly and we do indeed have a little heir for Simon in November...the little guy will be following in his father's fashionisto footsteps
as I went through our baby clothes today and came up with exactly two unisexy (unisexish?) articles of clothing in all four boxes of Julia's retired pink and purple baby frill...
1. jeggings (c/o Jessica)
2. a reindeer suit (c/o Ben and Kelly Jo)

so I am voting girl again for the win
be back in a lukewarm flash with something less interesting

stay tun-ed.

30 weeks

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23 August 2011

3/4 cooked...if my math is accurate. 

I think I should've kept these updates to a monthly and not weekly minimum but I've made a pledge and Pattons don't break a good pledge.

On the update front: I passed the glucose tolerance test which was good considering I possess zero ounces of self restraint and guzzled my usual chocolate coffee en route to the lab. The baby is very, very busy and has little room for his/her agenda to sit contently in the rest position. Only hiccups and gymnastics for little shim. My ice cream intake has been dramatically increased to a daily if not hourly frequency which is just the way it has to be I guess. My shoes have gotten oddly smaller which would lead a savvy detective to surmise that perhaps some swelling might be taking place. My favorite. My eyesight has improved a millionfold with the help of my new glasses and since I started typing this post I devoured an entire log of pre-sliced of mozzarella cheese. 
Gross, Grace.

and now I ankles
 and a little hint of my left foot toes topped with lazy, slouch stomach and a straight lipped smile
I still think we have another little lady on board. 
 I also think that Julia is going to need to learn to do a lot of things independently in these next ten weeks 
Por Ejemplo:
hold her own bottle...{ridiculous}
maybe dismount from her crib and fetch her own breakfast...bit of a stretch but I'm optimistic
walk (please please Julia)
speak some basic English: "I would like to take a three hour nap now, please", "you looks very nice today, Mom" etc...
I know potty training is out of the realm of possibility but I'm a believer of a good miracle...who knows
and maybe learn to style her hair in a more feminine manner

Just those things, that is all. 

pleasant Tuesday evening wishes to you and yours.

sibling spotlight

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 Bear with me for 37 seconds while I jot some things down in my brag book.

We all know that if it wasn't blogged about, it didn't really happen. 
My three oldest (still younger though) siblings have recently accomplished blog worthy feats.
  I know my humble share the goods with you interested and captivated folks. 

We'll start with the oldest and work our way down...

Daniel ... age 26
(who seems to have his Facebook photos on serious and annoying lockdown. I was really hoping to share my favorite toga time maybe)
was recently accepted into Georgetown to get his Master's in Public Relations and Corporate Communications and perhaps the best part about the whole thing is that his employer is generously picking up the tab
kudos and bravo

Emily ... age 22
(also a disappointment in the photo relevant photos so I had to go with a photo in which I'm assuming she is bridesmaiding least hopefully thats the case with the bouquet and the hot pink ruffs, nails and twin)
is wrapping up two months of hard work as a World Youth Day intern in Madrid, Spain. Unfortunately, I think I'm more jealous than proud of her endeavor. 
Emily, a curtsy perhaps?

Paul ... age 18
(was lucky enough to have a shot on my phone handy)
(let me see if I can say this correctly and natural sounding)
(say that one time fast)
Because I am the furthest cry from an athlete...I am equal parts proud and impressed. 
improud or simply pressed, I suppose. 

A round of e-applause for all three Seaton studlings
and some exclamation points from my perch on the sidelines for good measure

also I'd like to give a special holler out, honorable mention and smaller photo to 
Peter ... age 14
 (he is nonpan on left)
for recently becoming a follower and commenter of Camp Patton
I appreciate the support and business, Pedro

(Andrew (16) and Sarah (12)...I'm still proud of you...maybe just a little bit less so
just kidding ... prom)

older but ne'er wiser sister Grace

Pregnancy report coming up in a jiff...yip to the eeeee.

lipstick and greens

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22 August 2011

I don't wear lipstick (only sparkly Lip Smackers for me) so I'm going to need to have a little chat with Simon and his beauty regimen tonight about how Julia got into, applied and ate an entire tube of Covergirl's Hot Cinnamon hue today circa 7 in the am.
No Monday morning doldrums here.

It's been 36-48 hours since I've showcased my specialty: unimpressive pants alterations!
Back in akch today. yay.
I found these campy greens at the Goodwill with the tags still attached orphaned from the maternity clearance rack at Target (make sense? it better).
(don't mind my proud, loving gaze at a not pictured Julia ... it cometh naturally)

I simply sewed them tighter but not quite jegging tight as that would be a bad idea at many moons preg. Rolled them to higher waters and added my staple mustard, elastic and straw tail
 had some high school Senior photos taken
with stomach egg and mint leaf feet

I'm going to rate this alterashe a huge success as I've worn them every day since the fix. The panel (not're welcome) is riding high and ribcage height
and I ♥.

Hope all Mondays around the blogosphere are faring well.

Mrs. Patton

{check it:
Anniversary appropriate and brilliantly written post by blogger/home schooler/everythinger extraordinaire Dwija!}


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Happy Anniversary Simon!
{Timothy Willoughby Photography}

Our marriage is a big two year old now
 (I counted..1, 2, done)
fancy that
I thought it would be appropriate to celebrate with a splash of wedding photo overkill on an otherwise routine morning. Thank you for two wonderful years together and for making me audibly laugh every single day. 

 three of your most recent gleaming diamonds:
grace: Simon, would you mind grabbing my antacids?
simon: sure, if you wouldn't mind finding and retrieving a bedpan for me in return.

 (while changing Julia's diaper)
simon: this is horrible. 
this is really, really, really bad. 
it smells just like labor and delivery.

grace: I think my new skin brush is clearing up my melasma
simon: and your crow's feet? is it helping those?

 no teeth smile Grace, omnivore Julia and fatty bebe numero dos


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