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31 January 2012

 I'll give you one guess who was voted favorite, nicest, happiest, cleanest, best, and favorite (again) child for the day.

Simon Says

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 In an effort to halt Sebastian's frequent nightly wake ups Simon tried bribery and said, 
"Just as soon as you start sleeping through the night ... I'll love you even more than I do now."

 While we were checking out after (stupidly) purchasing potty training supplies the cashier handed us our receipt and coupons and Simon said, "Oh, look - we got a coupon for free wine and Xanax ... because we're batpoop* crazy."

On Julia's preference to slip a little tongue in when she kisses Sebastian, her dolls, and her parents, Simon said, "rated PG-13."

*family friendly blog censoring

the help

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30 January 2012

newest place to park, drink, and take a moment for herself.

Things Julia brought and dumped in my running shower this morn (after she'd had her fill of staring of course): handful of chocolate chips, jar of peanut butter, the contents of her bottom dresser drawer, a pair of scissors, and the pacifier that was keeping a sleeping Sebastian content.

She is and remains to be ever the helpful elf.

knitting update

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29 January 2012

This is what I have to show for my eight days of toil.

I joked that the cowl might be ready for use in the year 2020. Now I think that may have been a little optimistic. I started with 35 stitches (per the directions) and now all of a sudden have 49 or 53 ... I keep miscounting .... so its inevitably going to be an asymmetrical trapezoidy shape by the time I get it finished in 2025 or 2040.

So, basically I guess you could say that knitting is going well.

Really, really well.

Sunday Haircut

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Sebastian had lost most of his hair but he had a remaining double decker rat tail that simply wouldn't shed. Simon kindly took matters into his own clippers and gave him the Dr. Evil this morning.  Sebastian is obviously a huge fan of his new look.

bonus: Her highness was (of course) jealous of the buzz and all of the attention Sebastian was getting, so we had to feign a Mrs. Evil.

Winners all around.

I trust your Sunday is going just as swimmingly.

happy campers

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27 January 2012

wishing you the happiest weekend ever.

some things
Ann listened to my pleas and is back to blogging!
Lindsay's thorough and appreciated potty training tips
Bachelor Ben gets grillllled on Ellen (so funny)
Congratulations to Paige!
Adrienne shared this awesome newish sewing/DIY/everything blog

also a semi-unfriendly reminder to please link your email address to your blogger id so that I might reply to your friendly comments.





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25 January 2012


Don't let those supposed happy campers fool you.  Sebastian broke from his usual happy dappy routine to be a screeching no sleep maniac the past several nights. And as a result, I had to let go of the smidgen of sanity that I had been saving for a rainy day. I think he maybe slept 26 consecutive minutes once ... otherwise it was just teeny feline naps that usually came to a screeeeeeching hault at the most convenient times ... when I was doing important things like shaving my left leg in the shower, watching the ever-edifying Bachelor, tending to Julia's pleasant demands, or teasing my hair.

Being the seasoned and veteran parent that I know I am, I figured he was just a stubborn babe and I was just about ready to let him cry it out at the ripe old age of 12 weeks. Luckily, I thought I caught Julia feeding him a penny so I went digging for copper and struck gold in the form of a bottom tooth. Perfect. I dipped into my bag of parenting no-nos and gave him a generous coating of teething gel, laughed at his soured and expressive reaction and I am confident that we will soon resume living in peace and loving harmony.

I'll have to consult my perfectly up to date and intangible baby book but I don't think Julia sprouted ivories until around six mature months. Next thing I know he'll be riding a bike sans training wheels and making fun of big sister Julia on her tricycle.

cautionary confinement

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24 January 2012

I think ... scratch that ... I know the highlight from yesterday came in the evening after Simon had left for work and I was changing a notjusturine diaper of Sebastian's. Julia suddenly started choking on the bacon bits that she was eating whilst toddling around my lonely ankles. She quickly turned from red to purpley and stopped coughing. I tried patting her back which normally works but she just kept not breathing and turning colors and I started to get panicky. Very panicky. I somehow performed the Heimlich Maneuver on the little patient which magically did the trick and dislodged the bacon and other bits of delicious looking accompaniments from their trap. Once I talked my heart rate down out of the thousand beats per minute range and made sure that Julia was back to her old self- facial color and all, I turned to finish diaper duty for Sebastian where I was promptly squirted in the face by justurine.

Some lessons learned.

So today, Julia enjoyed meals of tasteless mush, playtime while tethered to my person, and extraordinary amounts of Curious George and the Bunnies speed recitations (to keep up with her penchant for fastfastfast page turning). And little mister Sebastian has not had his diaper changed once.

New found caution, prudence, and boooooooooooring be ours.


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Julia was -hot tears, red-faced, could spit if she knew how- l-i-v-i-d when I wouldn't give her a 13th fiber gummy inarow this morning. Simon was trying to sleep upstairs and I was scared she might wake any other sleeping persons within a 15 mile radius of our cottage so, being the kind and patient mother that I always am, I turned on the adult tooth brush and let her go to hygiene town.

15 buzzy minutes later ...  her teeth, entire tongue, both cheeks, earlobes, 26 squares of toilet paper, and the right quadrant of the toilet seat were all deemed brushed and squeaky clean.

Oh, I'm sorry. Uninteresting?



Snapshots of a Sunday

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23 January 2012

Cari graciously hosted many lucky bloggers over at her blog, Clan Donaldson, for another fun edition of Snapshots of a Sunday. Check it. Now. 

ps if you don't laugh at this post you should probably go find a new sense of humor. now.

Sunday Report

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22 January 2012

hello internet.

Reporting live from a wild Sunday of screwing up row after row of purl and/or knit stitching while attempting to make this cowl.  So far, so bad. I might have to call it quits and settle for a lengthy potholder/ferret saddle/pretend king size Snickers bar if things don't start looking up soon. Sebastian is providing a grunty soundtrack for the relaxing activity while Simon and Julia take their afternoon naps.  You know you care.

And in even more exciting toddler development land ... while Julia still hasn't learned the word "no" (praise all things good and holy) she learned how to shake her head this morn which just might be worse.

Sebastian has added approximately zero to his skill set today or ever.

Ending and apologizing for setting the bar lower than ever before in postland.

And back to my yarn sweat box I gleefully trot.


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21 January 2012

Untitled from grace patton on Vimeo.

If you make it to the end of the clip ... I applaud you. You will also be rewarded with a guest appearance by someone whose name rhymes with pie man.  This is my last clip of Sebastian doing nothing for this month. De nad.


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20 January 2012

Happy Feast Day!

To celebrate, Julia acknowledged your presence for the third time since your birth and attempted to shove a purple pacifier in your mouth. She missed ... all 76 times. 

We also styled the remaining bit of your hair. You loved it. 

A day to remember!

FUS Alum Blogs

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I love reading blogs. I probably read too many blogs when I should be doing other things but I justify the time investment by socializing outside of our cottage ... rarely to never.  I've found severalish blogs written by girls that I went to college with, some of whom that I didn't really know then but that I like to creep on now ... many moons later. Safe, easy, and fun.  Instead of reporting on Sebastian's no-sleep ever habit and Julia's new affinity for wearing everything from her dresser on her person all at the same time, and just how much I regret letting Julia eat eggs this morning, I thought I'd enlighten the Camp's readership with blogs much more exciting than my own.  Deep breath - that was a long sentence.

(These are listed in no particular order except for maybe favorite to least favorite of course I'm kidding and saying this in a robot voice)

Not only did Emily graduate from FUS in the fall but she is also my little sister. She tried to be sneaky and write a blog without my knowledge but little does she know that I tirelessly troll all entertaining sections of the internet, so I found her blog, Just Weird Enough. My only (gigantic) complaint is that she doesn't update her blog enough. Seriously. The world would be a laughier place if she would just stop being so selfish and dedicate some time to the comedic cause.

I lived in a big house with lots of other girls (8 to be exact but 7 to be legal and if you asked our landlord) for my last two years of college and Laura happened to be one of the luckies during one of the semesters.  She writes at A Spoonful of Joy about life with her husband and adorable little boy. She also does a phenomenal job meal planning and posts realistic encouragement for mothers. My new goal in life is to be as fit at not pregnant as she appeared to be at 9 months pregnant. Insanity.

Bernadette and her husband are also talented photographers and their incredible can be seen on their blog, An Endless Pursuit Photography.  Their cutecutecute daughter, Rosie is just a few days older than Julia and might give her a run for her husband in the chase for Jenny's son Joey's affection.  To feast your eyes on the most creative pregnancy announcement ever, I recommend scooting on over right this second. Update! New blog here. I'm jealous.

Tricia writes a great blog called Making it Feel Like Home. She shares all kinds of superb recipes, cleaning tips, and peeks into her cutely decorated house. Thanks to the vonderful vorld of blogging Julia, Sebastian, and I recently had the pleasure of meeting her and two of her cute kids and we are all hoping to see them again soon! Julia promises not to steal Ellen's pacifier again - really.

Ann and I are actual friends in real life (lucky her). I often flew to her house for Bachelor viewings, Pilates sessions, Riesling, and delicious meals way back in the college days. Her blog, Daily Anntidote reports on fashion finds, real life funnies, and even had a long running series on her incredible footwear. This is my shameless plea that she please come out of blogging retirement because I'm still stuck in a rut wearing kitten heals and low-waisted whiskered denim without the help of her impeccable taste and dressing guidance. Update! All thanks to me (I'm sure) Ann started a new blog with fun daily themes and everything here. Go forth and follow. Now.

Sheena's sister, Farrah writes over at one of my new favorite blogs, Patrick and Farrah. She covers a whole myriad of amazing healthy but delicious looking recipes, gorgeous photos, stellar and unique music selections, and little snippets of her life with her husband and her baby. I might have to request that we move to Florida after residency so that Sebastian can start wooing their pretty little lady very soon.

Lizzie (Jenny's sister) started a hilarious blog about her life with her husband and their two little boys. I don't let Sebastian read it because he will get good looks envy over little Charlie, I don't let Julia read it because she might start prematurely crushing on little Mikey, and I don't let Simon read it because then he might switch his 'I'll read one blog a day rule' alliance over to her blog, Do You Live in a Rock? If you don't laugh out loud at her most recent post -- you should probably go find yourself a new sense of humor, stat.

Hillary, (Jenny's other sister) also started a brilliantly funny blog about her life in Colorado (I don't want to give away her city in case she is more careful on the internet than I tend to be). Sometimes things happen to me is a musto reado as she posts funny stories about not kissing, thought provoking posts on faith and the single life, and a handy list of vocab to refer to when reading her genius. Why are you still reading my blurbage? Go away.

Audrey recently started blogging over at It's a Rowdy Life about her business and pleasure travel adventures, upcoming wedding, and life as a Texan. She is refreshingly funny and honest about life as 1/2 of an engaged couple and recently posted some gorgeous photos of a wedding of a fellow Steubie Alum (no blog --- that I know of? sorry.) Go forth, read, and enjoy!

I'm so happy I found Colleen's blog, Martin Family Moments. She writes about life with her husband and they five kiddos. You name it -- she's probably covered it. Running, NFP, her crazy 17 day diet, kiddos, fashion, and beyond. She also recently got together with non-alum Cari and I am an ugly shade of green with envy of both them and their small caravans.

Cathleen writes over at Pioneer Bookworm about her life with her husband in Belize .. and I Bejealous. Not funny. But her post about almost running over a snake and actually running over a goat -- is funny. And her photos are amazing. And she writes great book reviews. And you should hop over and read. Hop you go!

I had the pleasure of living with Joanna my sophomore year of college. She had the coolest leopard print Nokia, taught me the cottage cheese wasn't gross if you ate it with Triscuits, and tolerated a marathon watching of first season of The Bachelor in one sitting with shallow me.  She writes honestly about her struggle with infertility life with her awesome and supportive husband on her blog, Still Standing.  I try to keep my emailing pleas to post to a minimum. This post made me laugh out loud for a long, long time.

Liz recently started writing a great blog, Miraculous Mama, about her life as a youth minister, wife and mom to two cute kiddos. She does a great job of writing about the importance of instilling faith in your kids and the teachable moments of life. She manages to accomplish more in one day than I have accomplished since Sebastian was born .. not even kind of an exaggeration. Liz and I lived together for my last year of college. Lucky girl. 

Rebekah writes the sweetest blog, Treasuring the Little Things, about life in Canada with her two adorable little girls (and one little tbd on the way!) and her husband who is currently undergoing to rigors of law school. I'm jealous of her daughter Felicity's name and of Rebekah's gorgeous pregnancy glow. I'm going to start assigning her posts as required reading for Julia and hope that her daughters' sweetness rubs off on her. Rebekah also makes the cutest hats on all of Etsy. Bold but true statement. 

I never actually knew Ashley nor did I know she went to FUS but I'm so happy to have stumbled upon her fun blog, The Big White Farmhouse.  Ashley writes about the impressive activities she does with her three boys, posts delicious recipes and has an enviable 'life list' where she lists things she'd like to accomplish before her next birthday. Brilliant. Ashley also sews by hand, which should equally impress and intimidate you.

Maria and I had a lot of English classes together but, very unfortunately we didn't get to know each other very well. I'm so happy I found her blog, All Things to Please because I've gotten to 'know' her better and appreciate her wit and dry sense of humor. She writes about life as a stay at home mom to two cute kiddos and wife to an attorney. Funnily enough, Maria currently hails from the small Southwestern town where I spent most of my childhood years.

Jenny recently changed the name of her blog to the highly appropriate and relatable, This Mama Needs Coffee. She has a son just a few days younger than Julia and is expecting her second this spring and so I thoroughly enjoy reading her similarly good and similarly frustrating moments because I find great solidarity in her smart and entertaining writing. Her son just might be numero uno on the list of suitors I approve of for Julia solely based on his good looks and funny madre.

Lisa and I never actually met (lucky her) but I am so happy I found her blog, All Things Gale. She writes about her hilarious adventures with two sweet and spunky kids (and another due very soon!), creative and healthy recipe endeavors, and crafting that puts my paltry sewing attempts to shame. Lisa is one of two bloggers that have inspired me to maybe think about trying to take up knitting.  Twice now, I've Googled a recipe and her blog comes up immediately, so basically she is BIG time.  You have to check out this post on how to make a headboard. Wow.

I would imagine if you read any blogs at all, you've come across Anna's blog, In Honor of Design. She is basically a blogging celebrity and my only claim to fame in life is that we lived together for a year in colegio. Not that you don't already know, but Anna writes about everything from design to fashion to life as a mom to two gorgeous little children. She recently started a brilliant link-up series on modest fashion and if I ever change out of my house shoes and stringy hair I just might participate.  Watch out universe. 

Similar to Anna, Natalie is also a blogging star who authors the famous blog, The Busy Budgeting Mama. If you keep a blog and ever get discouraged about your layout, photos or creative content, do not visit her blog. She is a graphic design mastermind and every post is prettier than the last.  I'm going to have to put her site on the danger list when Julia learns to navigate the web because the birthday parties she throws for her girls put any of my bran muffin with a candle birthday fiestas to serious shame. 

Maureen keeps a funny funny blog, Little Stay At Home Momma. She chronicles her hilarious life as mom to the adorably incorrigible Davy and mischievously irresistible Gianna. I can't wait to read about her third little angel because if he/she is anything like his/her sisters, we are in for a real treat.  I'm actually in the process of hiring Davy to come and give Julia comedian lessons. I've read a few of her charades out loud to Simon and they've actually made him laugh out loud which is a huge feat in and of itself. 

Meg writes the craftiest blog ever ever, Handmade by Meg K. This is another blog I will never let Julia visit because she will then laugh at my 'crafts' consisting of no handmade sock monkeys, pajama eaters (originally found here), or personalized towels. Meg wrote a genius 'how to knit a cowl' post yesterday and don't think that I'm not going to attempt and fail at the pretty this weekend ... because Iyam.  Luckily for the rest of us, she includes clear and detailed tutorials on how to (try to) emulate her brilliance.

I've linked to Sheena's blog, Bean in Love, before because she is a spray painting, home decor DIY genius.  She prettifies the impossible on a tight (smart!) budget and shares how-tos with us decor dummies on a weekly basis. She recently announced that she and her husband are expecting twins! And I can't wait to all of her bebe related projects. And, of course, I can't wait to (not creepily) fawn over her gorgeous babies on the net. 

Abri is a talented photographer and highlights her gorgeous sessions over on her blog, Abriana Chilelli Photography. Abri and I were in an English class together in college where we had to sit in desk circle and 'discuss' our reading assignments. I searched high and low for a cloak of invisible for this particular class because I hate speaking to more than three people at a time but Abri always had impressively insightful comments and made thoughful, effortless contributions to the circle (of my hell). If we're ever in Colorado, I'm marching the fam over to her camera for a family session because her work is so impressive and we have about one photo of the four of us in existence today.

Maria (sister to IHOD's Anna) keeps not one but two inspiring blogs. The first is about life in a rural Kansas town with her three beautiful kiddos, Enjoy this Moment ... for this Moment is your Life
where she writes about the hilarious and touching moments that every mom can relate to. I'm insanely jealous of her photo quality and am hoping to achieve quality half as fab in the near future with our new camera (in transit). Maria also writes and manages the wonderful blog, Going Natural Woman all about Natural Family Planning. She posts helpful and inspiring resources, shares her own experiences and those of other couples using NFP.

Gorgeous Camille is an actual model (I know) and writes the lovely blog, Life in Modification. She is honest about the changes that life brings after having a baby, runs an awesome series on real mom style, and posts amazing DIY projects. Camille single handedly convinced me that the backwards cardigan trend is a good one ... which is quite a feat because I used to think it was silly and ridiculous.

I've linked to Ana before because I love reading her blog, Time Flies When You're Having Babies. She writes about life as the wife of a PhD student and as a mother to two adorable girls.  I get embarrassingly excited when I see she has a new post up and almost didn't make it through her Christmas blogging hiatus. She keeps a much better word:photo ratio in her relatable posts, shares great recipes, and is refreshingly honest in her writing.  Ana recently wrote a heartbreaking but beautiful post that I only recommend reading with some tissues close at hand.

Okay. I think that is all the alum that I stalk. I didn't realize the list was so exensive. Maybe I should've broken this up into 32 little posts. Oh well. 

If you're lucky enough to have been missed by my bright eyes, have a blog, and went to Franciscan, let me know ... I'm always hungry for more.

New Additions!!! (8/13)

Let Love Be Sincere - (by Mary) I started blogging a couple of years ago. I was inspired by some other blogs that I saw, and thought it would be a really cool thing to look back on.  In college, I kept a journal.  This is kind of my journal, only way less full of angst and family friendly. I started this to write about my family's history.  Crazy enough, when it started, I was just pregnant with my first child. He is now adorable.  And he has a brother, who is really cute too.  And, we are expecting our third.  I anticipate he will be ridiculously good looking as well.  I am married to a really cool man. He is funny. He is caring.  He is faithful. Oh, and he drives me crazy.  We fight. a lot.  But we love each other more than we don't like each other and we love God more than we love each other, so it all squares away.  "Let love be sincere" was one of our wedding readings.  This is our story...

La Bella Vita Dolce (by Francine - one of my favorite blog friends!) her blog is ... (take it away, lady!) about things I like. I suppose that means I write a lifestyle blog, if you can call it that. You'll mostly find photos of my kids, a few crafts, outfits, recipes, DIY projects on a budget, and other sundry posts about life as a stay-at-home parent.

McSisters We are 4 sisters, we are wives, we are mothers. Life has spread us across 3 states, from New England to the Midwest, so McSisters is our virtual kitchen table where we can shoot the breeze and discuss the things we love: family, food, making a home, art, fashion, the British Royal family, other blogs... yadda, yadda, yadda.  Welcome to our world!
Cevi Chion (by Natalie) My blog is called Cevi Chion or as some say "to each their own".  It's of a mix of all necessities - food, clothing and shelter.  A few recipes, outfit planning and Pinterest projects (both successes and failures).  It's a work in progress, like it or not - Cevi Chion!

This Sunday's Best (by Amy) I'm the Sunday and this is my best. :) A little of this and a little of that. I like to share random things that are new (to me anyway!), tell stories about the pup who runs my life, not to mention the husband anecdotes; document, no doubt, manymanymany events as we embark upon new adventures in this place we Sunday's call home. But ya know, what happens in blog land, stays in blog land. ;)
To The Heights (by Olivia) At 'To the Heights', I blog about life as a newlywed, a middle school Religion and Art teacher, and hopefully someday motherhood.  From 'how to' posts, to DIYs, to recipes, to funny stories from school, I pretty much just write about anything and everything in every day life.  I want this little space to be both positive and realistic - to highlight how the ordinary, mundane things in life can pull us higher up the mountain of life if we let them; but to also acknowledge that sometimes the ordinary and mundane tasks in our daily lives are hard, and that it's ok to have an "off" day.
Living Little (by Lauren) I recently moved from Johnson Party of 5 to Living Little. I like to write stories about our family, including our "fashion-savvy" 5 year old daughter and our two "rough and tumble with bruises to prove it" boys. Through tears, laughs, tantrums, and humbling moments, our kids continue teach us how to live little.

Healthy Happy Home. (By Kristin)  I started out writing about a random decision to compete in a pageant, added in some marriage prep adventures (separately), but I've now transitioned into writing about ways to improve and enjoy our lives in the realms of - you guessed it - health, happiness and home.  Plus some funny-to-me stories about life and my 5-month old along the way!

Simon Says

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18 January 2012

Simon and Reed getting their happy on

After Julia fell down the stairs on my watch, Simon said, 
"I'll be keeping this incident in my back pocket for when I screw up the child rearing."

After I asked Simon to find a shirt at Target to complete the birthday present loot for one of Julia's friends, Simon innocently asked, 
"oh sure, like one that says 'princess' or something?"

Regarding a blemish on his forehead, a frustrated Simon unenthusiastically said, 
"I look like a unicorn."

While on the phone during one of his night shifts, Simon not so happily said, 
"I'm on my way to the ER to see a lady who claims she is emitting a smell that leads her to believe something crawled up inside of her and died."

house shoes

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17 January 2012

or slippers. House slippers.

We were in desperate need of formula today so I ran to Target to hunt and gather the delicious before Simon headed into work this afternoon.  Of course, I walked out with more than just formula. I sprang for some electric green bananas, generic teddy grahams, organic bunny grahams, creamer, and these faux fur-lined moccasins. The shoe section was teeming with slippers on clearance and these were $6.98 (Minnetonka who?) and I convinced myself that I needed a fringed pair. After all, I rarely to never leave the house and my usual foot uniform of ill-matched socks seems to greatly annoy my charges.

If the fact that I'm posting about a new pair of slippers doesn't tell you how scarily exciting things are around these parts, well, I don't know what will.

Tread carefully and have a pleasant eve. 

ps go Marky Mark


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16 January 2012

With Simon only half way (I don't know how that is possible as it feels like we've already served more than a two week near death sentence ...  perhaps black magic?) finished with this abhorrent (strong but appropriate adjective) rotation, the evenings sans man have gotten reallllly fun. Sebastian and Julia have an impressive knack for timing their most pressing needs for the exact same second of the exact same minute of the exact same hour every single night. Tonight, after Julia methodically ate and spat out an entire tangerine (rind and every bit of juice included) bite by spit by bite again, she was in a sticky, sticky state that even my hygienically cavalier eyes couldn't ignore. I gave her a bath (and by gave I mean plopped her in the pink tub and listened for signs of life while I cleaned and filled the arsenal of night time bottles* the piglets require) while Sebastian's cries crescendoed from his post in the swing in the living room.  After filling the last of the bots, I retrieved the little man and brought him into the bathroom where Julia was starting to do my absolute favorite, "eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh", which can mean a lot of things but this time I put on my translation cap and impressively deciphered that it meant that she wanted up and out of the tub. I washed her hair with one of those baby blue nose suction things (semi-clean ... worry not) while she protested too much to be believable, swaddled her up and took her in to her room to get ready for the oh so blessed bedtime. After getting her pajamad and down, I noticed that Sebastian was a content little bathmatrat and so 
I let him be for as long as he'd hang. Earlier in the eve, I somehow misplaced a really not clean diaper of Julia's. I'm sure I put it somewhere for safekeeping that made perfect sense at the time but I'm not terribly thrilled about it's resurfacing ... whenever that may be.  I accidentally fed Sebastian Julia's almond milk twice (he is still breathing) and Julia pointed at the computer and demanded, "show!". Back up. I thought I only let her watch Netflix when I was in a true bind. Clearly not.  For a small human with a very limited vocabulary living in a house with "no television" (this means nothing as Netflix and Hulu are worthy and adequate substitutes these days) to know that the laptop = 'show'?  I think its safe to say with all of these proud moments combined, my failing work here is done.

*Sebastian is now a fully formula fed babe. We didn't get my thyroid levels straightened out fast enough post-pregnancy, my supply died a slow but definite death, and now the poor kid is poisoned with the powder. If he ever fails at anything ever ... I'll know where to place the blame ... both parties. 

honey garlic salad dressing

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those ingredients
blender/food processor
however you take your lettuce (cheese, nuts, vegetables, fruit, rainbow sprinkles)
toss to coat lettuce and company

(serves four diners)

Guest Post: Kelly Jo on Residency

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15 January 2012

Editor's note: This guest post is long overdue.  Kelly Jo kindly and promptly wrote this a long time ago around the time when Sebastian was birthed. I hope she accepts my apology for its unbelievably tardy debut.

Kelly Jo is one of the sweetest ladies I've ever met. She recentlyish married Ben who happens to be the most talented and hilarious storyteller I've ever met. Ben and Simon went to med school together and Ben was kind enough to be in our wedding where he accidentally donned a navy blue blazer for our wedding photos (making for a hilarious story to add to his arsenal of fun). Ben was lucky enough to be present when Simon and I met (again) for the first time in South Bend back in October of 2007. 

Whenever I feel the need to complain about Simon's 'horrific' schedule I am quickly reminded of Ben's even worse schedule as a surgery intern and try not to complain quite as loudly as I had planned to initially.  I have a lot to learn from Kelly Jo in the way of complaining less about residency. In the mean time, she patiently tolerates my frustrated emails and offers e-solidarity.

Kelly Jo keeps an adorable blog about life with Ben and their mischievous pup, Trudy. And for the record, the dance floor at their wedding trumped all dance floors at all weddings past, present, and future. 

When Grace asked me to do a guest post and take over as engineer of the complain train while little CBass get’s situated, I just couldn’t resist.  Not only is Grace one of my favorite people and the source of daily laughs, but I have a lot that I can relate to her on.
The need for chocolate creamer.
Having one of the youngest members of the house drink out of the toilet and eat dog food.  Although my little Trudy has a teensie bit of an excuse.
And probably at the top of the list, we are both the adoring wives of two intern residents.
If there is ever someone I can send a late night message to complaining about the fact that my hubsters is still in the OR, it’s Grace.
So, when she presented me with the subject of
“What Has Surprised Me About the First Year of Residency” it sounded perfect.
Hence...the following rant:

Resident Evil: The Life of an Intern’s Wife
Ben and I got married back in June, so we are the true definition of newlyweds.  We skipped the honeymoon and headed directly to the majestic paradise of Wichita, Kansas where he one week later began his residency in general surgery.  I had been warned of some of the things to expect, but nothing can quite prepare you for the truth about the evils of intern year.

#1 My Husband Turned Into a Zombie
Let’s just talk about the past two months.  September and October were the dreaded transplant rotation.  Now you hear horror stories about being married to a resident, but none of them really do justice to the horrible schedule that is known as transplant.
To paint you a picture, this last week my hubsters was out the door by 4:30am and didn’t get home until 11pm or later each night.  Now, I knew the hours would be long and he would be tired, but I had nooooo idea they would be this drastic.  There were even some nights in there where he wouldn’t get home until 1:30 in the morning and would be back out the door within a few hours.
So, needless to say, when I did see my hubby dearest, he was a sleepy eyed version of the man I once knew.  Unrecognizable if it weren’t for the aqua scrubs that he donned 24/7.  I found that in these last few months I talked more to the Trudesters then I did to him. Which sometimes wasn’t so bad...she at least appreciates my freestyle raps.  So yeah, those two months were a nightmare, but thankfully that rotation was over faster than Kim Kardashian’s marriage and all is much, much, much better now.

#2 The Blood
“Honey, one of the scrubs will need to be spot treated.  I got some brain blood on it.”
That isn’t a sentence that most people would expect to hear in their first month of marital bliss, but I got lucky.
I don’t think that I will ever get used to all of the blood.  It’s on his shoes, his scrubs, his undershirts.  Plus, if that doesn’t gross you out enough, (for those squeamish you might want to scroll down), last week he had to have some tests done because he had blood squirted in his eye!  Just when you think you’ve had an exciting day, blood in the eye will always trump any story you had in your pocket.  Cue sad trombome.  Back to the tests - thankfully they all came back negative, but that isn’t something that you even want to cross your mind when your man is off at work.  Plus it’s just....mega gross.

#3 Things That Go Beep In The Night
If the hours weren’t enough to whine about, let’s just talk about the beeper.  I am trying to think of a way to describe that little black thing without using any profanity, but it is proving to be a struggle.  All hours of the night...BEEEEEEEEEEP BEEEEEEEEEEP BEEEEEEEEEEEEP!
What’s worse than the beeper pages is trying to get my zombie husband to rise from the dead to answer them.  My initial whispery “Hey honey, your pager is going off” slowly has to escalate into “Ben Flippin Jordan! Wake up! People are dying left and right!”
No bueno.  No bueno at all.  I hate that little contraption and if Trudy somehow chewed it up, I don’t think that I would mind one little bit.

However, it hasn’t been all that bad.  Yes, it’s fun to complain but I actually feel like I’ve learned about being a good wife from being tossed into the horror story of residency.  Being a resident’s wife has taught me to be less selfish and more supportive.  It gives me an even better reason to make home a place where my husband wants to be.  I’ve developed new friendships with other women who are going through the same thing and have found those friendships to be a source of mutual support.  I have become quite the handy-woman and tackled projects and learned skills that I never thought I would.  Plus, I have found joy in writing about and sharing all of these day to day life tidbits.
So, here’s to all of the other resident wives out there: To alert husbands, bloodless laundry, and beeper free nights. *clink*

Keepin’ It Real,
~ Kelly Jo


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14 January 2012

A rare and semi-precious gem. Julia showing affection ... sort of.

My dad sent me this article containing book recommendations for Downton Abbey fanatics.
The cutest new blog by a fellow teaching retiree (go prove her husband wrong and follow along).
Jenny renamed her witty blog. I love it. 
 Jessica told me about this mean website. Very mean but sometimes very funny. 
Simon has been loving this song and clip
Now that the weather is finally freezing (yay.), I think I'll make some fried ice cream.

Have a great Saturday. I have plans of the grandeur variety to fold some cold and neglected laundry, mop the floors (as opposed to the ceiling) and organize my dresser. 
yee to the haw.

failed helicopter

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13 January 2012

Much to my horror, Julia has learned to open doors. More specificially, she has mastered opening the door to the upstairs and the door to the downstairs. And because I cannot clone myself into a tangible guardian angel for the little tyke I'm certain she is going to fall down one set of stairs and die any minute now. I wasted the entirety of Sebastian's late morning nap (not to be confused with his early morning or mid morning naps) trying to force the climb DOWN stairs milestone.  In 45 minutes she got down one stair and I pulled out about 1/3 of my hair. Combined with the postpartum hair loss ... this leaves me with five wisps on the old nog. So pretty.  I'm actually typing this on location at the top stair where she is still refusing to budge right now. We'll see who wins the stair off ... kind and patient mom or smart and advanced toddler. Wish us luck. 

My fear was realized as just before I clicked, "publish" Julia fell down the stairs head first. While she didn't die and only suffered minor head trauma and bleeding, I just might keel over from the weight of my new yoke of guilt.


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12 January 2012

Muchos kudos to Kayla for the Camp's new look.  I gave her virtually no direction but she managed to design and install the entire thing in something crazy like eight minutes flat.  I've promised her my third born in exchange for her stellar services. Needless to say, she is thrilllled about the fair trade.

In the spirit of fresh, I updated the about page. I'm sure you can't wait to scurry up and over. You know you have nothing better to do. 

Sleep tight.

precious moments

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11 January 2012

accurate pictorial of our days:
*trying to explain that the physics of wrapping my large skirt around her teeny wrist do not work and do not a pretty bracelet make. Rough little toddler life.
*Sebastian is just content to be held and semi-clothed
*mom wearing maternity leggings for the fourth day in a row
*fuzzy. always fuzzy.

I almost went with, "I Will Survive" for the title but that would be too optimistic. I had to go the ironic route instead. We are 1.5 weeks into a 4 week rotation in which Simon is gone 2/3 of the day and the 1/3 that he is home .. he absolutely must be sleeping, showering, eating, or running out the door back to the laboring ladies.  I know ... woe is me. Not woe is the man working the crazytown hours.  
 So ... blah blah ... he works a lot ... blah.  I know things could be worse and I know I should look for the silver lining because it is certainly there to be found (potential parent of the year nom? no. new found deeeeep appreciation for adult interaction? yes, yes, and yes.) but I don't.

Instead, I've been moving one step forward and two steps back in the housework, patience, and personal appearance realms. Armed with a broom and baby wipes, I'm in a constant war with Julia's breakfast, snack, lunch, snack, dinner, snack, dessert, snack leftovers strewn about the house. Julia is put in her timeout spot more frequently every day for bopping Sebastian over the head. And while I was filling out paperwork at a recent appointment, I was asked if I worked outside the home with a tone that makes me fairly certain the kind gentleman had already clicked, "no!!!!' using my momfit (ill-fitting jeans, sweater over turtleneck and one pearl in left ear) and mom scent (casserole of spit up, toddler breath and a perfume mask) as telling indicators.  

Some of the more precious momes:

I decided to take Julia and Sebastian out to the backyard to enjoy the balmy temperature yesterday afternoon while Simon slept off the night of work (including the unbelievable amount of potent incense that one interesting patient and her doula had left lingering on his person). Of course Julia immediately dug through the recycling (cans: not too safe ... not too boring) and then wanted to scale the stairs ("sears! sears! sears!"). Feeling generous, I let her climb while I followed behind with Sebastian. And of course she fell backwards at the tippy top and I caught her at the price of dropping all but Sebastian's right foot. I'm still trying to find my heart as it immediately leapt out of my chest and pounded away at record speed.

While I was in the kitchen this morning, probably being especially domestic, Julia traipsed in and circled my legs as she usually does at 6:07. After her 100th grunt I finally looked down to see what the ish was. No, no, no, no ... please no. Is that a liquid trail of poorly digested dairy tears allllll over the floor? Oh ... her socks are saturated too? How on God's greenest earth did it get all the way up to her shoulders? So, I suppose the answer is yes, she is still highly sensitive to dairy and that bite of yogurt this morning was a huge mistake and I shouldn't even let her look in the general vicinity of the refrigerator that houses many ounces of the poison. Praise all things good and holy for Kirkland Disinfecting Household Surface Wipes.

Last night when I put Julia down to bed I shut off the light, closed the door and went on my merry way. I picked up the remnants of tornado Julia, checked my email and brushed my teeth before I made Sebastian a bottle. When I went to get him to begin his marathon bedtime routine and didn't see him in either of his usual haunts ... the floor and the swing ... I panicked. Early and spontaneous crawler? No ... I had left him in Julia's room on the changing table. Good thing he knew to keep his mouth shut and his flailing body glued to the table or else we may have had some mayhem on the loose. Melodramatic? Never. 

Fine. Just three little moments. And of course, in retrospect, they aren't as scary, exasperating or near night ruining as I felt they were at the scenes of the crimes. These weeks will pass. The season is temporary. February will save me ... if I'm not dead by way of adult conversation deficiency or dairy intolerant waste inhalation. 

Thanks for reading/skimming. Your sharing in my ridiculously tame woes makes me feel better already.

angry bird

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10 January 2012

You mean to tell me that no one outside of the exclusive circle of two (his parents) enjoys clips of jerky baby movements and vowely sounds?

oh, weird.

Simon Says

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09 January 2012

{bongo drum bebe brassiere}

After getting into bed and hearing both needlets crying Simon sighed and unenthusiastically said,
 "the cattle are lowing."

Every time I crawl into bed after tending to Sebastian's demands in the middle of the night Simon always says, 
"I'll get him, I'll get him."
(too late and you know it)

Every time I change a diaper sans diaper pad Simon skeptically says, 
"You're brave."

After reporting to Simon that I had successfully and finally gotten Sebastian to sleep while Julia was also down for her nap, Simon enthusiastically said, 
"spirit fingers!!"


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08 January 2012

Julia's vocabulary is growing by the day. She sees how much attention Sebastian gets for merely making sing songy vowel sounds and so she has gone into competish mode. Much to your delight I'm sure, I've compiled a complete list for you.

mama - mum or mama
dada - dada
baby - dada
juice - juice
keys - kee
banana - kee
blanket - kee
cracker - kee
cookie - kee
prenatal gummy vitamin - sum
fiber chew - sum
earring - sum
diet coke - sum
fat coke - sum
church - chooch
milk - geek
cheerios - shet
her friend, Bridget - synonym for poop that rhymes with pit
hi - hi
ice - hise
eyes - hise
eggs - eyes

And when asked/told to say please, thank you, sorry or Sebastian she suddenly falls completely and stubbornly silent. 
She must have really polite parents and she must really love her brother.

thanks Sebastian

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  for the shoulder flare that adorns every single one of our shirts, for pushing me to up my daily laundry quota, and for keeping us humble when we repeatedly venture out in public donning your latest ornamental feats.

(Yes, we've heard of a burp cloth. We just like to play with fire and obviously we generally lose the game.)


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06 January 2012

 No contest. The cuter child award for today goes to Sebastian. Hopefully Julia can pull it together and wow the judges tomorrow.

I have nothing even remotely exciting to report to you fine folk. I suppose I could tell you about one of Julia's latest tricks. No? Too bad. She must be taking diligent notes on how to care for a baby from her mother as she has taken to swaddling (very poorly of course) her dolls and telling them to "shhhh shhhhh shhhh shhhh" while bouncing violently up and down. I can only hope the emulations don't stop there and that alllllll those times she has followed me to the bathroom will start to pay off soon and she will ditch her diapers for the real deal potty.  Otherwise my modesty will have been sacrificed for absolutely nothing.
 Too boring?
Well, I could type about my wretched cleanse. Definitely no? Okay. I'll just say that I noticed that my upper arm skin is suddenly very soft. I won't complain about that but I'm still waiting for the promised 'mental clarity' to rear its pretty head any minute now.
Anddd just like that - I'm drained of news. Sorry.
I'll share some fun from more exciting humans now so this isn't a complete waste of your precious minutes
Simon's younger brother Andrew's girlfriend's (got that?) inspiring food blog. I want to make and eat these, this and this right now. Right right now. So smart.

A new blog that I am thoroughly enjoying. Especially this post.

Do you love Downton Abbey? Take this very official quiz to find out which character you are (I'm Violet).
(thanks BiblioMOMia!)

Free nail polish.

Have a nice night or day.


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