it's not that complicated

10 June 2013

I don't know which one of you intruders snuck in and force fed the kids crazy pills last night but I am your biggest notfan right now because this morning just about killed a Grace. Julia and Sebastian's day isn't complete unless they get a minimum of ten good screaming fights in but today they amped it up to 20 before they'd been awake for a solid hour. I was getting all gloaty and pat-myself-on-the-backy for letting the kids feed themselves their own bowls of instant oatmeal (what? "naturally flavored" "whole grains" and "heart healthy" doesn't scream HIGH STANDARD OF LIVING to you?) and when I'd gotten out of the shower their bowls were licked clean which does not happen because Sebastian has recently entered the reign of picky eater terror. I went to go get my coddle and congrats on when I saw that he had shoved the bowl's entire contents under his booster and in case you have a lower standard of living than I do you'll not know that dried instant oatmeal has the exact consistency of dried cement 20 years after it's been poured.

So.

And you know how I feel about music when I run/walk. I loaded the kids up to find that my iPod had been switched on (blaming Sebastian but it may have been me) and was now dead and yes I shed a tear because I cannot walk/run to the tune of nothing. I kept swearing that Julia's faux fur (almost three and she totes that thing around like the blanket junkie that she is and might always be) was getting caught in the wheels because SURELY the kids weren't that difficult to push/my minimal arm strength hadn't vanished over the course of my two day break away from the chariot. Yep -- that heavy. And about to get heavier because I'll be needing to strap a fire extinguisher to my person for my lungs on any future runs that might possibly occur. Might might might. Might is the key right there.

But then I saw Julia chugging over toward a crying Theo assuring him, "I'll help you!!"


and it's not even that cute but in that moment I smiled because I hadn't gotten my morning smile in for the day. (I think the volume needs to be CRANKED to work - sorry).



therapy for Theodore from grace patton on Vimeo.


So if her future as a professional Sebastian harasser doesn't pan out I think Therapist for Theodore has a nice ring to it.


bleh. I'm such a mom. SUCH a mommy blogger.

32 comments:

  1. Nice! When my 16 month old is screaming in the car it goes

    E - Mama R is crying...
    Me - I know
    E -R STOP CRYING!!! STOP CRYING. Mama I don't like that noise

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    1. Love it!!! I'm 39 weeks pregnant with my first and CAN'T WAIT!!! =)

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    2. Congrats!!! Siblings are hilarious...

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  2. Such a sweet moment to capture. Sometimes those are all you need to break up the day, you know? At least that's what I keep telling myself...

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  3. Seriously, that is the cutest video.. I am going to make my older kids watch that video.. When the youngest starts crying the older to clap their hands over their ears and a yell, "Mom... she's pitching her fit, make her stop.." Actually, come to think of it, I could use some therapy from Julia...

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  4. "just be happy" hahahaha! LOVE IT!

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  5. don't cwy. just be happy. love it!!! (:

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  6. So cute! And much nicer than Grace's stern "STOP IT! Stop crying!" complete with finger-wag in Sophie's face.

    Hope your day gets better!!

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  7. Having that kind of morning too (the first part, not the sweet child part. . . ). There has been a lot of crying at our house.

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  8. Theo's side eye at the end says he skeptical of the advice...but will maybe try it out.

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  9. Hahahahaha!!! "Don't cry. Just be happy. Buh-bye!" That was so funny! And don't obsess over the blankie situation. I have 3 boys who STILL must have their faves with them at all times (in the bed and when we travel - not actually with them at all times). One is 14 (yes, you read that correctly), one is 10 and one is 8. My 14-year old has informed me (when asked about the duration of the blankie compulsion) that he will be taking it to college with him stuffed in his pillowcase "so no one will know I have it but I can take it out for bed". So there you go. The 8-year old also has "lambie and duckie" - two stuffed animals that have seen better days. I live in fear that lambie and duckie get misplaced. It wouldn't be pretty.

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  10. "Don't Worry Be Happy" is now playing on repeat in my head. Too cute. Thank goodness she threw that one at you after this manana.

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  11. I am so glad it is just not me that is having a horrible day. Today everything seemed to tick me off. After Miguel kept tapping his pencil on his desk loudly for the 638348324089247584725398 billion time, I turned to him and looked at him straight in face and snapped it into two (sayin nothing.) Needless to say he started bawling. Zion was kicking chairs so as I safely tried to escort her out of the classroom she yelled "don't touch me or I will get my momma to lock u up!" Oh and Shedkl, came in with a giant 'money sign bling bling necklace' and well refused to sit down alllllllllllllll day. "Rappers don't sit down they stand". Tomorrow will be better 8 more days.... I wish moms could check out for summer too, i need a vacation!

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  12. I know how you feel! I loaded up my four youngest siblings into the quad stroller to go for a job but holy heck I could barely push it! Then it started to pour rain, the kids started to cry and I am still recovering from attempting to jog with the stroller when the rain was pouring down!

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  13. OMG that video. My heart. It's smiling. "Be happy!" then one final "be happy!" as she drives off and the little "bye!". TOO cute.

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  14. My sympathies on the bad morning. I definitely know how that goes. But the video was cute -- very cute. My own little 2-year-old was yelling, "Too YOWD, Jude! Dats too YOWD!" Which made his little brother scream even louder, etc. etc.

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  15. It is weird that I never imagined Julia talking? I mean I read your ‘Conversations with Julia’ posts and all…I just never imagined her little voice saying full sentences! She is the SWEETEST…‘just be happy’.

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  16. when I first tried to watch the vid I was all "dang, you really do have to crank the volume up! I can't hear ANYTHING!" ...and then I realized that my headphones were in the jack.

    I blame my idiocy on the 10 times I've had to scrub doggie poop out of the carpet today....tradsies?
    I thought not.

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  17. FYI: Only mommy blogger I read. And I'm not even a mom who can sympathize. I just think you're awesomely funny and real. I might use Julia's methods on the teenagers I teach. I'm going to get a little four-wheeler and pedal around to students' desks and say, "Just be happy." Of course, they'll be complaining, not crying. Difference? Maybe not. I'll also be wearing pants.

    -Danielle
    littlebitofwowe.blogspot.com

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  18. PROPS to you for running with the three. I'm doing it with the one, and I can't even lift my arms to wipe away the tears of pain.

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  19. Apparently she and my dear hubs went to the same counseling school. I often heard "just be happy" when I was in post partum funk...

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  20. Does Julia want to come be my therapist? Don't cry, just be happy! I bet she would make me laugh! :)

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  21. Omg that video was so cute I watched it twice. I can't even wrap my mind around how you push that big ass stroller, ESP up the hills you live on. What a damn good workout, is all I can say. Puts our little runs around Blueberry street in baby-blue-Hollister shorts to shame.

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  22. Sweet girl. But too bad she didn't just go put herself to bed when she went "night night".

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  23. Julia is the same age as my #5 and Theo is five days younger than my #7 and they remind me of each other so much -- maybe it's the age? I don't know, but it's moments like these that keep my heart from turning to a lump of coal. Of course, the real story is that I should be very alarmed that the rest of the urchins don't even twitch when the baby is screaming. And when I say, "why didn't anyone TELL me that the BABY is SCREAMING!?!?!?!?" they turn to me and say "what?" Empathy, that's at the top of our priority list, obviously.

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  24. Dr. Julia, Be Happy specialist & train conductor. I stopped crying when I watched the video (thanks no sleep & solicitor who woke BOTH kids 10 minutes into their naps!) so I would be willing to write a recommendation about her technique.

    Easton is also Team Blankie 4 life. It's so gross smelling and we have to tell him it's going swimming when we wash it, otherwise ughhhh

    I hope yours are in bed and you are kicking back with a nice cocktail! Cheers! :)

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  25. Teehee! What does she charge for advise ? ;-) I have to admit my heart jumped when I saw Julia pull back the star shaped toy! I had visions of it bonking Theo in the head ;p

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  26. that video... oh my doodness dracious. i love dr. julia and her, "don't cry. be happy". so stinking cute!

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  27. ugh. Sam crapped all over me today and screamed about it - waking his sister, the beast.

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  28. Omg that video!!! Both such cuties!!!

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  29. With all those "conversations with Julia" posts of yours I tend to forget how young she is (until I see one of these videos of course and hear that adorable voice of hers). Priceless! Heck, she could be therapist of any of us "don't cry, be happy". Thanks Julia!

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  30. OMG Im like almost in tears! I tell you! That is HYSTERICALLY AWESOME AND SO SWEET!!!!!! So precious! Stop "bad momming" yourself (momming...new word.) Grace! When my baby cries the toddler yells "Stop crying baby!!!!!!!" heck...you are clearly, CLEARLY more pleasant and kind and charitable than you give credit to yourself for being.

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