Julia ... again.

20 May 2012

you like her Dorothy Hamill haircut? I thought so.
Come on over and I'll give you the same, free of charge.


Since Simon is at work again and I've run out of high chairs to clean, cars to decrumb, internet to surf, and wrinkles to scrutinize I thought I'd give you an update on Julia's docile behavior.

Her obsession with the toilet grows weirder by the day. She used to just splash around, take a little drink, and put entire rolls of toilet paper into the toilet. But the other day she was calling from the throne telling me that she was, "suuuuuck!!!" (stuck - for any dumbos in the audience) so I begrudgingly put down my champagne and chocolate that I was enjoying on my chaise lounge and went to see what the emergency was. I found that she had wedged both of her bare feet deeeep into the toilet "hole" (?!).
New lows.
Every hour.

A few hours after that excitement died down we were in the car when I looked back to see her carefully taking apart a pen. She had stripped it all the way down and was enjoying sips of the good stuff: the very full vial of purple ink -- again, in the car that I was helplessly driving.

I do have to say that she has graduated to a multisyllabic pronunciation for Sebastian .. up from "bash" to "basher". He loves it, obviously. The other day I ran outside to throw some boxes in the recycling bin and when I returned 8 seconds later I found her trying to cut a sleeping basher out of his car seat "saps!!!" with the not dull knife I had used to break the boxes down. I have only me, myself, and Grace to blame for any future heart attacks and chunky grey highlights.

We did purchase a portacage for very mean 90 second time out punishments since grounding her and taking away leg shaving privileges wasn't doing the trick.  We are five dramatic time outs in, and she has already gotten really good at saying, "sigh!!!" (sorry).

So, I guess you could say that things are definitely looking up.

14 comments:

  1. Spencer and I had a good laugh at the imagery of a Julia with both of her feet wedged in the toilet bowl hole. So gross and so hilarious. I have to say, you are wonder woman to deal with it all. Seriously.

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  2. Aww! That "sigh" is so sweet.
    Great job on the haircut.

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  3. Seriously, I want to hang out with her, she sounds like she would really spice up my life. So hilarious (also, sorry for the stress, that's not hilarious.)

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  4. This is seriously a tough age. I cannot imagine doing it with a second baby. You are superwoman.

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  5. Oh the bathroom. I HATE the bathroom. All of my older humans have been trained to close and latch the bathroom door behind them every single time because I just cannot DEAL with the toddler in the toilet. I hate it that much! What a gentle soul I am...

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  6. Your kid is hilarious! I know it may not seem that way to you but I've gotten so many great laughs out of the stuff she does!!! I don't even think I'm brilliant enough to come up with half of what she does....

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  7. Free of charge? You should start a little business ;)

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  9. How many requests have to be made before you put up a video of her saying "Sigh!!!" in the portacage? I would pay big bucks.

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  10. Oh my goodness, she definitely makes your life interesting! Mine too, since none of my kids are quite so creative!

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  11. Can you just send her to me now? I'll fly you out for monthly touch-ups to the Dorothy, since it's a hairstyle beyond my skill set. There's a vacant house adjacent to our property. I'll put her and The Jude in there, and take bets as to how long before they raze it to the ground.

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  12. Oh, not the toilet! At least she's interested...?

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  13. Toilet obsessions are the worst! But at least she isn't decapitating stuffed animals...yet. Good luck!

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  14. Meant to comment muuuch earlier, I nearly died laughing at this one. Your kiddos are going to be such wonderful, big-personalitied, awesome-addition-to-the-world people if they make it past toddlerdom. And my head went immediately to this song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tnXGg09XPEQ

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