a tale of two parents at the park

17 March 2015

It's funny the stupid things you start to care about once kids come on the scene a la parenthood.

Grocery stores that aren't overly zealous about keeping their car corrals cart-free and therefore much easier to transition children from car seats to cart? I will drive many extra minutes to give you my grateful business with my little cherubs in tow.

Grocery stores with a reliable supply of free cookie samples for said cherubs? Again, I will find you.

Any and everything with a drive-thru? You're the best {stillllll waiting on the post office but - Picky Patton here}.

Waiting rooms with toys, no matter how germ-infested? Come to mother dearest.

Enclosed playgrounds sans wood chips with a smaller structure for smaller kids? Gold.

I used to think a playground was a playground was a playground but I've come to know and appreciate that I was oh so wrong. One thing I will miss when we move is the overly impressive glut of fancy playgrounds here in St. Louis. It's almost like they're all in a silent but deadly playground competition for best and most wonderful playground because we keep finding better and better gems.


Plastic bear - built to scale ... kept Phoebe Badger and her stare entertained for five minutes aka an eternity in baby time.

So last week after naps and dinner when the kids were in rare crazycake form and I knew Simon was working a 24 the next day and the anticipatory dread was reaching new and happy heights - I loaded them all up and set up camp at the park nearest to the hospital so that we might transfer the parental duties and power as soon as humanly possible. My heart and its generosity knows no bounds.


Julia thought I was taking her to a business {casual} meeting and dressed the part but was surprised when tackling her brother wasn't on the agenda and found herself sitting smiley in timeout.

Anyway, Simon came bearing gifts of pizza crust {Phoebe's favorite - he ate his pizza in the car so it was sort of fresh, judgers} and M&M's and was treated like kid royalty upon his arrival.

I'm always on the mamarazzi prowl and was later looking at photos from the SOS sojourn and had to SALTS (smile a little then stopped as opposed to LOL) because here in all her go-getter mom glory we have the two photos Simon snagged ...


if you give a Phoebe a pizza crust ...

Anyway, we have Mom on her park perma-perch.

And then we have Simon ...


lazy and uninvolved.

Opposites attract and it takes all kinds and a bevy of other excuses.

But I know other moms can relate.
Or I think.
Or I hope.

{lazy dads ... you're welcome in my corner too. I'll bring extra chairs}

45 comments:

  1. Not sure if you knew about this so I'm going to leave it right here: https://tools.usps.com/go/ScheduleAPickupAction!input.action

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    1. haha - yes, I use it all the time when I have a pre-printed label! but for the times I don't have a printer to print one (like always)

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    2. Since you have to go to the grocery store anyway--what you need is a grocery store that has USPS services too. It's the only way I'll mail packages these days...I hate the post office too (with or without kids tagging along!). But, a drive-thru post office is genius! Maybe one way they can revamp the struggling postal service??? I'm looking for a drive-thru Subway close to my house!! I'm getting tired of McD's!

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  2. I'm with ya on the shopping carts. I will park directly next to the cart corral as well, for an even easier transition. And yes to the drive-thru! Our Dunkin Donuts just got a remodel and they added one. Praise the Lord!

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    1. the BEST. It's so terrible how close ours is .... mostly

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  3. I'm lazy at the park too. ;) Cheers!

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  4. If we weren't supposed to rest at the park, they wouldn't have provided benches. Right?

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  6. Watching my husband do flips on park equipment is why I keep having babies. (#4 due June 26 *just* so he can be the park flipping dad for another good 10yrs!)

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  7. Okay where is this magical park in St. Louis, it looks amazing! I have to know! I live near the pretty fantastic parks of Tower Grove Park, which gets bonus points for a splash pad.

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  8. Oh gosh, I am THE laziest parent at the park and my husband is all "let's go and play kids"!!! And Julia in timeout is just too cute...she takes her timeouts very seriously, all business and all whatev it's cool!

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  9. Always and forever in the lazy mom camp. If you really want to get judged do as I do and pull out the phone- strictly for Facebook and Kindle app time while keeping half an eye on the offspring
    .hey who said park time was for them ;)

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  10. That's how my husband and I are at the park too! I only get off the bench to take pictures ;)

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  11. Pretty sure my mom would yell at Simon for climbing the slide like that (because I never, ever, never tried to do that when I was a child...) so he may be the "funner" parent but you're the wiser one ;)

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  12. Haha! I feel like this all the time and I am just a teacher! No real comparison, I know, but there is that moment of "never moving again" once they are finally occupied and I am finally seated.
    Gotta love kiddos.

    And pizza crusts.

    Http://katrinacrouch.blogspot.com

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  13. I totally try to stick to the bench. My husband runs around with the kids. When I meet friends at the park I am always a little embarrassed when they follow the kids around and I try to hang out. I find myself following my kids around just because they are.
    I love an enclosed park. I dream of living somewhere where there are amazing parks. Northern California doesn't seem to care. I drive about a 1/2 hour to the next town just to get to a better park.

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  14. Personally I prefer the park bench option. All the better to watch you with my dear. I'll let the husband and much more fun parent do all fun things. I'll be the one refereeing and yelling all sorts of not so veiled threats with zero follow through. Not to mention I hate playgrounds! I think they are all death traps after a broken toddler arm two summers ago. No thanks! But fenced in is a MUST.

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  15. At least you are pregnant, I don't know what my excuse is. ha ha

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  16. That park looks stellar. And I'm jealous of the no snow. Ugh! I love a good park bench, though I did have to break lazy park mom habit once to pull overly fun & enthusiastic aunt out of a tube that was too small even for her 115 pound frame... It was like a tube for ants!

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  17. I'm in the lazy mom camp for sure! I would add a book into that park bench picture if the playground is enclosed and the inmates can't make a break for it.

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  18. A million dittos to STL and their parks!!! How have I never found that bear one?!

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  19. A million dittos to STL and their parks!!! How have I never found that bear one?!

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  20. Around here I've noticed in the summer lots of grocery stores hire extra teens just to move the carts back into the store! They sit there poised and ready to remove any cart that dareth enter the corral. The empty corrals kill me!

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  21. When you move down to the good ole Sunshine State...... Take the drive to Lakeland to search out Barnett Park and Common Ground. Both parks have no wood chips, their own 4 and under areas, and plenty of benches. A group of city planners from all over the country once came to CG to view/inspect.

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  22. oh if only we had fenced in parks!! The kids are always disappointed when I only am nice enough to take them for a walk rather than to the park when I'm the only adult. Small wonder why Dad is the fun parent!
    PS the pizza crust bit cracked me right up.

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  23. Same, same, same over here. My husband comes home and starts playing all sorts of chasing games with our girls or runs around endlessly outside with them. It makes me tired just to watch him with them! I'm joining the lazy moms club. I'll bring the coffee :)

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  24. I am right there with you on drive-thru everything! Also waiting on the post office to install on. How wonderful would that be?! I mean really!

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  25. If any northerners could point me to a wood chip free park anywhere in New England, I'd gladly drive there. We're all about the indoor playgrounds these days though...for some reason a whole bunch have opened up in my town

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  26. I don't participate much at the park either. I look at is as a time for independence and love watching my child interacting with others or exploring a new environment.

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  27. I am excited to sit on the bench this year. Last year I had a new walker who was determined to walk behind the kids on the swings and to climb the climbing wall. With a 20 month old now, he can run away from me as much as he wants and I can't hear the no no no's from my bench.

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  28. Lazy mom camp supporter here! That's what the benches are for!

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  29. I'm the president of the Metro Detroit Lazy Moms chapter, hello to you!

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  30. Haha. Love it! I only have one and she's 2.5 months, but I love the little peeks into our future your blog provides. You are hilarious.

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  31. This is my life. My husband is so much more fun than me, it really is embarrassing.

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  32. Um you have another baby Patton growing inside of you. Obvs the most important thing to do was to keep that baby safe on the park bench! ;)

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  33. Hah, park bench is my perma perch as well, while my husband runs around and plays "monster" with the kids. I never promised I would be the fun parent! But I am the one who reads them books, so there. ;)

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  34. The other day I was sitting at a picnic table nursing the baby and my husband was running around the park with our toddler. I said "I think our parents' generation mostly just sat here. I think they would have called this 'helicopter parenting.'"
    He shrugged and said "I just want to play with him."

    So sweet! So makes me look bad!

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  35. I'm sure you'll find great parks down south but you'll have to test the temps of the slides before you send the kids down them... because third degree burns on the butt are no joke!

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  36. Oh my freaking gosh yes. I've been deemed the not fun parent like Mitch on Modern Family, and I'm like, bring it. Don't make me get off my bum to push you on a swing,PLEASE, just run in some circles!!!!

    And enclosed PARK! Jealous!!!!!!!! I don't think we have one of those around us in Nebraska but I will now be on the look out!

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  37. As a mother who suffered from secondary infertility, and would have loved to have had 4-5 kids (since i was one of 5 siblings) it makes me sad to see how complaining about motherhood has become so popular on these blogs. Maybe it's the wisdom of hindsight, but I have a feeling you will be sorry for all the whining about mothering you do on your blog. Best wishes and I hope you find the joy in your vocation.

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    1. Regular readers of this blog know how much Grace and Simon LOVE their kids and are grateful for them. Laughing about the tough parts of parenting with other moms-- getting some sympathy, shaking our virtual heads and saying "gee, this is a crazy life"-- isn't the same as whining. :)

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  38. Sorry if this has already been said, but USPS Click & Ship is a life saver. I saw above you don't have a printer...yes, you need a printer :) But I keep a stock pile of Priority Mail envelopes & boxes (all sizes) in my basement and then simply fill out the online form, print the label, affix it to the package, and drop it in the box at the PO. Easy peasy ;)

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  39. Boo, I didn't think you were complaining, and maybe I shouldn't say this now, because it most definitely IS complaining, but..um....somebody I know has decided to go to parks without swings because I, I mean she, would much rather just sit and relax!

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