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Simon Says

19 May 2015


sweatshirt: c/o Emoi Emoi
pants + buttondown: JCrew/Factory
shoes: c/o Rack Room Shoes
shades: Amazon

Theo's brother beater: c/o Phoebe's dresser drawer
shoes: c/o Rack Room Shoes

After reading a pet-friendly rental house listing a few months ago and thinking out loud, Simon said, "well we don't have any pets but we will be moving in with a fully stocked zoo."

After claiming for YEARS that he could change ANY diaper with a maximum of two wipes Simon said, "well after this week of GI kid hell ... I have to admit that my lifetime wipe quota went way, way up."

While folding a load or 78 of long neglected laundry Simon asked me, "and do you want me to put your clothes away too or just put it all back in the dryer where it's normally kept?"

While watching the three older kids rough house, Simon said, "Theo's idea of wrestling is getting his ass beat."

While going through his (high school and college) clothing and deciding what to keep vs. what to donate ...
Grace: I think a good rule of thumb is to get rid of anything you haven't worn in a year
Simon: What about the rule of, "could potentially be worn in the next ten years" ?

While watching all the kids for two hours Simon texted, "lunch only took ten minutes - how is that possible?"

Regarding the boys' vastly different looks Simon said, "Sebastian got my rugged looks while Theo resembles more of a china doll."

Every single time a new Taylor Swift song comes out and he hears it on the radio for the first time ... he very genuinely asks, "the new Miley Cyrus single, right?"


After changing yet another diaper during the third round of what we {jokingly} suspected may have been Ebola {aka the stomach flu on very strong steroids} moved through all four of the kids three separate times Simon said, "it's been like an epic battle between the North and the South."

FOUR days after Princess Charlotte Elizabeth Diana was born I asked him if he'd heard that the baby finally had a name and Simon seriously said, "no, did she have a boy or a girl?"



WORK IT.

While packing up my faux succulents Simon very seriously asked, "do you mind if I pack up these petunias?"

After I put Phoebe in what I thought was a very cute romper Simon said, "she looks like a 94 year old ready for her water aerobics class."


In response to my announcement that I generously did not eat any of his very favorite lime popsicles out of the freezer during my (still ongoing) pregnancy popsiclypse Simon said, "I believe you can go ahead and file that under 'sacrificial love'."

After I put on a maternity Maxi ...
Grace: does this look like a pioneer era nightgown?
Simon:
Grace:
Simon: well ...
Grace:
Simon: is it??

24 comments:

  1. YES. Dying over the crossed ankle photo and Theo's wrestling.

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  2. OMG the maxi dress conversation.

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  3. That second picture is everything!!! The laundry comment was my favorite cause that's where I keep my clothes too, they don't have the 20 minute freshen up button on my dryer for nothing!!!

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  4. The Theo wrestling one is even funnier because his outfit makes it look like he could take out anybody!

    The lunch one is hilarious. That's how I feel when I babysit #isitbedtimeyet

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  5. So funny! I also love that you can get him to pose for these pics...my guess is he fights it all the way, but secretly loves it ;-)

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  6. These are always so funny! A couple things though...did he lose a bet in order to get him to pose? I'm glad we aren't the only family that has conversations about their children not looking alike. People comment on Ace and Pierce all the time, and Chris will say...well...one is the mail mans. Hashtag not funny! And we went through that stomach thing which started off as non-stop throwing up for the first three days, followed by three full days of water works out the other end. Chris eventually put the (potty trained) boys in pull ups with underwear over them. HAHA!

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  7. Simon has the casual-fashion-blogger-in-front-of-abandoned-building poses DOWN. You've trained him well, Grace!

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  8. He's such a good sport about the pictures! Does he sometimes feel like he is in a relationship with Taylor Swift where everything he says might be turned into a pop hit/blog hit? lol Just kidding! (Feel free to not publish, I am tired and my sense of humour is not so sharp)

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  9. Oh. My. Gosh. That was funny! I had to stifle all my laughs because Husband is sleeping right next to me!

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  10. Ha! The water aerobics line is hilarious. And, truly, for those odoriferous diapers there are not enough wipes in.the.world.

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  11. Not eating the lime Popsicles? That is, indeed, true love. My approach to Popsicle rationing last summer was more akin to Mr Husband finding the empty box and saying, "You bought Popsicles?"

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  12. Battle between North and South!!

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  13. Would it be weird if I made your blog into a book, for my own personal use, of course. It is some of my very favorite reading material. Gets me through my late night nurse-a-thons.

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  14. LOL I love these. How is it possible that you got a funny husband and hilarious kids?! That is like my whole life wishes.

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  15. haha the second photo makes him look like a teenager stylin! lol the pose is so hipster!

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  16. bahahah I like him! He sounds like my husband! Minus all the baby-having :) also - popsiclypse, lol.

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  17. My boys were asking me the other day for "examples" of questions women ask men that they should never honestly answer! So I laughed at the last one, because that was the kind of question I was using....!

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  18. Crying/laughing! I really needed this today! I'm trying to turn my worries into prayer about delivery #5 and your upcoming move. You are AMAZING Grace!

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  19. Hooray! Simon Says is back! Thanks for the much needed pick-me-up.

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  20. And even though they clearly could not go on this family friendly blog, I silently thought of Simon's "lifetime quota of appropriately raised voice f-bombs" and chuckled to myself.

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