Sebastian's pose screams, "just photoshop everyone else out and my senior portrait is all set to slay"
I think I've finally found a small army of allergy fighting soldiers that when combined just right I can handle short outdoor excursions with my human troops. Not pictured: mom photographer in low key hazmat suit. You think I'm kidding.
Anyway.
The polite and thoughtful thing to do would be to just breeze right over the little stomach bug that rocked our world last week but ... I can't. It felt like all of my friends had dealt with the bug in the weeks and months prior and I'd been waiting for it to hit us too and when it ... didn't I thought maybe I had the warm weather and lack of cabin fever to thank. LOL. It was an uncharacteristically optimistic thought, I know. It was actually mercifully swift and since it worked it's way up directly from youngest to oldest Simon and I (youngest spouse first!) were last to be hit. Except that we weren't! Brit had talked about how her family has had great success taking this activated charcoal in the hopes of avoiding a bug that had already descended on her family and it came in the mail after the kids were sick but the parents took it anyway and ... we lucked out. Or it works. All the praise hands for Brit. And the charcoal.
It's both fun and funny watching your kids grow up and see little flecks of parental personality shine bright and unmistakeable every now and again. For example: one child fell ill in the middle of the night, gently woke me up by tapping on my shoulder and saying, "excuse me, Mom but there was a little spit up by my bed but I cleaned it up" and trotted back to his chamber. This child takes very much after Simon. And another child got sick shortly after the other and screamed the loudest most earth shattering and blood curdling scream about the situation and declared multiple times, "this is the worst day of my LIFE" the next day. This child takes very much after Grace. God has a great sense of humor. A great sense of humor indeed.
Third and final paragraph about the minute long plague. At one point one child was sick with no appropriate receptacle to be found anywhere around us and so I asked someone else to run and grab a bowl. They came proudly bounding back with this:
a wildly useful colander.
I'm done. Really.
A photo of Bosco to cleanse your palate ...
In other news, we finally put a hook and eye HIGH up outside the kids' bathroom door to keep one certain almost-two-year-old off the premises and out of the sink that she loves to plug and flood.
Completely unfazed, she redirected her efforts to her parents bathroom and her moms brand new bottle of badly needed (32 going on 16 ... yee to the haw) concealer.
The best part of the situation is that she looked my in the eye, legs completly covered in a lovely shade of Natural by Neutrogena, and answered, "nope" without blinking when I ask if she made the mess.
We now lock our door as well. Fool us once ... we'll figure it out one of these kids.
We'll end things on a cheery note. I was bathing the kids on Sunday night (or 1/2 watching 1/2 reading a book I've been waiting to come off the hold list f-o-r-e-v-e-r judge me good) on my phone when I had to quickly snatch a toppling Bosco out before he fell face first into the water. You know how this ends. My phone fell to a watery but temporary grave as I'm telling myself that in the spirit of the Resurrection ... it came back to life. I just turned it off and didn't touch it for a long time. I don't think my complicated and calculated phone-saving tactics mattered (we didn't have rice on hand) but ... I should probably just put bite the waterproof case bullet.
Life is a dangerous highway, after all.
Have a wonderful Wednesday
(that for some cruel reason ... feels like a Friday)
:)
My son (then a year and a half) got into my lipstick (matte! MAC! perfect red!) and in 10 seconds flat had it mashed all over the floor and his legs and face.
ReplyDeleteHis answer was the same as Phoebe's when asked if he'd made the mess >.<
I asked my husband Monday night what we should do "tomorrow" fully expecting it to be Saturday...and me and the baby now have a stomach bug...so I'm still thinking this weekend should've come twice by now. Going to have to check out the charcoal.
ReplyDeleteOne: Concealer is better than nail polish. Two: My phone took a dip in a pedicure tub (pre-feet soaking) and was also resurrected on Sunday! I sent a text to my sister that said, "my phone has resurrected, just like Jesus!" ;) And Bosco in the swing is just the cutest.
ReplyDeleteI'm just gonna leave this here. It might have saved some 3 year old lock picker's life.
ReplyDeletehttp://www.amazon.com/GE-Personal-Security-Window-Alarm/dp/B00178HMCI/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1459370480&sr=8-1&keywords=Door+alarm
My stomach for messes is getting stronger with each kid...but today my parents' dog got into the trash bag....with the...baby/toddler trash in it and tore it up all over the driveway and lawn. Wow. I gagged and gagged and gagged.
ReplyDeleteYou are so TOTALLY hilarious! I love the colander "help"! I'm sorry that you were all sick. Our 4 were sick all at once when they were 3mo, 2, 4 and 6. They were all throwing up simultaneously. It wasn't horrible. I was glad it was just 4-6 days instead of weeks where one after the other got sick. The mom who sent their child over to play with our 6 yr old and infected us all could not apologize enough and felt awful. Those things happen. It was a successful playdate and I knew she didn't know her child was sick (child looked fine at the time). Sounds like you handled things like a champ. Yes, it IS funny when their little personalities emerge...and you see aspects of yourself. I'm SO GLAD that you are back blogging! Your posts are the BEST!!!! Keep up the great mom skills!
ReplyDeleteWaffling between buying alllll the charcoal to be prepared for inevitable sickness and not buying because the superstitious side wonders if that's basically inviting the bug in??
ReplyDeleteI'm guessing Bash is Simon Jr and J is little Grace ;)
Tell us your allergy fighting secrets!
ReplyDeleteLove your hilariousoity
ReplyDeleteI just finished that book recently. Soooo good :)
ReplyDeleteMy husband was so proud of himself when his new phone boasted being waterproof (true story - many now are). So he cracked the screen 5 days after getting it...all the feelz on waterproofing phones. If it's not the kids it'll be the adult.
ReplyDeleteOh man, I laughed at this one, Grace. That colander. Oy vey.
ReplyDeleteOh, and just because I didn't happen to see anyone throwing this one out there (only barely resisted the urge to say "throwing this one UP"...oh. wait. did I just?...), but several moons ago, Shaun (husband) was going on constant work trips, and two work trips in a row, the kids got stomach bugs. It was not cool. So, I moaned about it on social media, and MULTIPLE people came back with, "Grape juice!" and then "Activated charcoal!" So, basically you dose everybody that's NOT actively puking with 100% grape juice (which apparently has some sort of specific acid that fights the bacteria in your gut) because it only works on people who haven't started upchucking yet (all you get is purple puke from the already afflicted...ask me how I know). And you mix in a little activated charcoal with the juice for all of the as-yet-unafflicted folks. (I do about a full capsule split into multiple applications of juice throughout the day for 2 and under, a half capsule per serving for older kids, and a whole capsule/serving for me). The activated charcoal actually works for the already-puking folks too, if you can find something they're willing to down with it in it. It drastically lessens the duration of the bug. ANYhoo, hopefully this all makes sense, but we've been using this method for 2 years now, and even with six kids in the house, we've never had the bug affect more than 2 people once we caught it or last longer than 24 hours. Novel ended.
Oh! And I managed to perform a very complicated maneuver in which, as I was bathing Theo whilst listening to an audio book, I leaned forward too quickly, thereby jerking my phone out of my waistband when the earbud wire pulled up short, disconnecting said earbud wire, and sending my phone sailing into the toilet behind me (basically, I couldn't have repeated that particular little trick on purpose if you had paid me). I grabbed it out lickity split (but did NOT lick it), and...nothing happened. Della (the 5-year-old) kept making helpful suggestions like, "Mama, when you have to order a new phone, maybe you should order me one two. Because I want one." Uh huh. Sure, honey. I'll do that. Good thing it remained somehow unaffected.
ReplyDeleteI drank a little too much at my first college party. Luckily I was able to make it to trash can before I got sick, unfortunately it was a mesh pattern
ReplyDelete:(
Ha! I was about to share an early 20s puked in a wicker trash bin story. :) Twinsies.
DeleteMy husband sent my iPhone in a lifeproof case through the washing machine. It survived and worked just as perfectly as before. They're not very cute, but they're awesome.
ReplyDeleteSo funny as always.
ReplyDeleteYour bathroom mirrors what ours looks like daily with an almost-20-month old hanging around. Last night it was lipstick!
ReplyDeleteKelly
The same thing happened to one of our friends - he was bathing his son and got him out to dry and changed, but couldn't find his phone. Low and behold, there it sits at the bottom of the empty tub. He left it alone and a few days later it worked like nothing happened! He called Apple and asked about some residual side effects and they basically told him that to a certain extent, iPhones are waterproof. Don't go deep sea diving by any means, but they can survive past a quick dip in the pool/tub. For whatever reason they can't advertise that, but it's still good to know!
ReplyDeleteI am so glad to have your blog again. Your doses of daily life make me smile & I truly enjoy everything. I am a mom of 6. 3 stepkids, 2 from my previous marriage, & now a late in life baby. We are dealing with the fun of teenagers & a toddler. We are down to just 3 in our home but it is always a juggling act. Especially when my husband & I both work full time. Thank you for letting us share a view into your life & to see we aren't the only ones that have interesting families. Love your blog. :)
ReplyDeleteI have (and love) a Lifeproof case and a very messy lifestyle, so if you're looking for a waterproof case, I highly recommend them.
ReplyDeletethanks! I had one before and didn't love it but the pros definitely outweigh the cons!! ha
Deleteok-- share the allergy tips? we are suffering badly here. and yes to activated charcoal. works!!
ReplyDeleteLove ALL your blog posts. Sometimes feels like the only real-life I get to see online anymore (apart from my own semi-neglected blog) :)
ReplyDelete