Pages

02 July 2013

Revelations and Admissions

It's like a twist on Confessions ... but less sexy. I think.

In the ADMISSIONS category today:

I almost threw down with the receptionist at the dentist yesterday morning. I won't bore you with the details (ha! do you see wilbur in the sky? no, of course I'm going to pelt you with the 'tails!) but I had an appointment at 10. The sitter showed up just as I got a call from the office asking where I was. Say what? I'm at home not dressed and about to start flossing because my appointment is in twenty minutes. She countered that I was wrong and late late LATE. So .... I ran out of the house and went as fast as the van's treads would carry me while listening to the reminder voicemail she'd left on Thursday 99 times in a row to make sure it still said, ... yep "10 am on Monday". There was no parking and I had a cow until Simon ran out in his surgery garb in between surgeries to let me into his super official lot. We speedwalked in together while Simon kept a smart and safe 10 feet away from my person as I ranted. And ranted. And ranted some mo. I ran into the office ready to hit play and speaker on the voicemail but she smiled and said that wasn't necessary and that I must've "misheard".

Oh, no she didANT.

The hygienist assured me the appointment had been at 10 (or she was scared I was going to project my annoyance onto her by way of a bite to the finger) but I still would like Receptionist Rong to wave a white flag in my direction. And a gift basket full of my favorite things. And a new watch because I'll pretend she's clever (but still wrong).

I need to get a grip on call weekends. This past weekend was one of the worst yet and how am I regressing? How is that possible? Maybe I can redeem myself this weekend because of course ... of course we have three in a bleeping row. Am I really tearing up just thinking about it? It was that bad.  There was no sleep and then a no sleep hangover and lots of miscommunication. Two years: please fast forward yourselves. Wishing my life away? Yip.

I've become a total drive-thru Diet Coke junkie. It's so pathetic. We've got aspartame and caffeine and addiction and convenience. Judge me hard.


And in equally riveting REVELATIONS: 

You know how Simon always accuses me of dressing Julia like anything but a two-year-old girl?
(frat boy, lumberjack, etc ...) Well Simon put her down for her nap on Sunday and I went to get her when she beckoned, "I awaaaaaaake!!!! I awake now!!!!" and she was wearing this ...


so! he has negative 99 legs to stand on from here on out.

My late night/early morning when Simon's on call 'can't sleep but don't want to watch a show for fear that I won't hear the predators outside the house' activity is ... the humor Pins.





(outsourced from here)

I always email them individually to Simon at work and when I ask if he opened them the next day ... "um, I opened the first one and it was sort of funny I guess."

Thanks.

My kids? Baby geniuses. Julia brought me "Jack's giant beanstalk" yesterday afternoon:


And then she brought me "a big giant big giant giant flower"


but was outshined by Sebastian's gorgeous arrangement that he picked himself because he is a machine - albeit a smart one.


"Here Mom - here's a bouquet and some emotion. Enjoy."

And Theodore?


He heaved himself in a rollover from front to back not once! not thrice! but twice in the past two days. He's going places ... fig and lit.



And that? That's it.

38 comments:

  1. "Here's a bouquet and some emotion"

    Luckily I know to not drink coffee whilst reading The Camp.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I would cry too, Grace, and I have no idea what your weekend was actually like. Go easy on yourself - it's a hard time.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Oh my dear goodness...Bash's legs...sqqqeeeeeessshh!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  4. We live on Patton Lake. It's in Northeast Georgia. Your babies are precious but don't buy into the whole "you'll miss it when they're grown" cliche. I love my babies who are now grown men and I'm glad they had happy childhoods (and that we all survived their childhoods) but I wouldn't go back to that time of life for all of the tea in China. It gets better. I promise.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I seriously would have flipped a s*** if the dentist pulled that one on me. Especially after hiring a babysitter. I am getting all annoyed just thinking about it. I hope your day has gotten better, lady!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. welllllll I sort of did. I'm sure there is some giant red flag in my file now. No joke.

      Today was better !!! Thank you!!!

      Delete
  6. Simon needs to get you an ADT security system-a so you can asleep while he is away. You must force him to watch those overly dramatized ADT ads where the call center person is scaring away the intruder. Totally should help you sleep better/cope with on call nights/weekends... at least in the sleep department-o

    ReplyDelete
  7. Those things were totally funny! Especially Doogie! And I think the call weekends are getting worse because you've been there, done that so many times. and there is no end in sight for the foreseeable future. It's like a mid-residence crisis. So tell Simon that you either need a new sports car or a boy-toy....!

    ReplyDelete
  8. Sympathy, wished you had gotten more satisfaction from the receptionist.

    I think Julia is adorable in the skateboarding t-shirt but agree that your dressing choices are now redeemed.
    3 call weekends in a row is just wrong; Charlie's call week includes the coming weekend but then we catch a break ~ just wish the grass could wait that long.

    ReplyDelete
  9. I will say some serious prayers for you these next few weekends- you are a warrior.

    ReplyDelete
  10. I have regular and recurring dates with humor pins. Bad mood? 2am feelings? Nothing on Hulu or Netflix? No worries- I have pins. And, in a pinch, funny amazon product reviews. And yes, I email some of the funnier pins as well. Beware- you might be on the receiving end now.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Humor pins are my drug of choice as well, AND my husband NEVER seems to get why they are so funny. It makes me nuts.

    As for call weekends--I think you're super human to deal with that shiz.

    ReplyDelete
  12. I pretty much exist on drive thru Dr. Pepper so no judgment here. Also if I were within any type of reasonable distance I would totally be your call weekend pillar of support and kid-watching but alas... Geography is not our friend.
    You are my favorite forever and ever.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Residency = hard core Coke Zero addiction for me.

    It was so bad that my teens my youth group (I was the youth minister) called it - and I quote - "Heidi's crack"

    I feel your pain!!

    ReplyDelete
  14. My hubs is a psychiatrist, and he doesn't usually do weekend call, but when he does I feel like I am going to have a nervous breakdown. I have been known to send him nasty text messages, spend way too much money on-line shopping (because retail therapy ain't no therapy with 6 kids in tow, unless it's on the computer...) or consume pounds of chocolate, or all of the above at the same time on those weekends.

    ReplyDelete
  15. My son has those same monkey pj's and the top looks great on Julia :)

    ReplyDelete
  16. You're doing it all wrong...it's supposed to be a rum and diet Coke addiction, emphasis on the rum!

    ReplyDelete
  17. I am also an habitual drive-thru Diet Coke drinker. Almost daily. I don't know if that will make you feel better for not being the only one, or worse for being in the company of the likes of me.

    ReplyDelete
  18. I would have ripped that receptionist a new one. She did not know how thin the ice was on which she was stomping...

    ReplyDelete
  19. The picture of Bash with the leaves goes down as one of my favorite in the Camp's array of awesome pictures. If I left it to the twins, the house would be full of leave by now.

    ReplyDelete
  20. Oh geez. I second Joy- 3 in a row is so wrong. Prayers! And I so wish every store had a drive-thru.

    ReplyDelete
  21. If you started a blog called "Just photos of Theo", I would follow that thing like nobody's business. Because I'm obsessed with him, sorry-baby loving creeper here. To be fair, I'm also obsessed with mine around that age. So cute and so squeezy.

    Also, I just drafted an entry last week, titled, "4 Honest Admissions" with plans to eventually post it as a link up. Then I saw this post and thought, "there goes any originality there." But you should get in on it someday when I finish and post that action...or IF.

    ReplyDelete
  22. Wow oh wow...Jerry and Sebastian give the same type of bouquets...sticks with emotion. LOL! Too funny.
    Sorry about the weekend. I know they just stink. They truly do. No advice, just prayer for you my friend and more emails of support.
    Hugs!!

    ReplyDelete
  23. My drive thru addiction is Coke from Sonic. They have "happy hour" from 2-4 everyday, which means the sodas are half-price and I love, love, love their ice. I'll warn you to kick your addiction now because when your kids get a bit older (like, old enough to know what you are doing but too young to stay home by themselves) they'll pitch a fit if you don't buy them one too.

    I have a dentist appt. today and you can borrow my receptionist if you want. Wanda called yesterday (yes, we're on a first name basis) to confirm my appt and told me my hubby had scheduled to come in 15 min. ahead of me to get a tooth checked but she didn't think there was enough time (she knows he babysits the kids on his lunch hour while I get my teeth cleaned). So we moved his appt, disaster averted...thank you Wanda.

    ReplyDelete
  24. Oh man, I would have lost it being told that I misheard! That really sucks! I am with you on the drive thru soda addiction, it's so much easier than unbuckling the brood to haul into a store when all you need is one named-medium-but-sized-large soda. Or as Easton says "mamas spicy juice", yes it is buddy no touching! I love the humor pintrest boards and will never understand my husbands inability to see how funny things are. So I screen grab them on my phone and relentlessly text my sister them. She gets it. She really does.

    Sending you well wishes and antiburgler/murderer strength (and booze!) thru your call weekends, for the next two years... :)

    ReplyDelete
  25. I love drive thru diet cokes. I even have no shame and would go right after the dentist. When I'm really bad, I also grab a pack of 3 cookies for $1 from McDonald's - I know it's bad!! ahhh. Oh well.

    Praying for you while you're on call weekends. I wish I could help - if you ever need anything, please let me know!!

    ReplyDelete
  26. "Here Mom - here's a bouquet and some emotion. Enjoy."

    And, I'm dead.

    ReplyDelete
  27. So I've been reading for a while now but have yet to comment.

    "My late night/early morning when Simon's on call 'can't sleep but don't want to watch a show for fear that I won't hear the predators outside the house'"

    Yes to this. My husband's away at a convention until tomorrow morning and I am completely cool during the day. Sort of. And then at night, even if the most threatening thing I'm watching is Parks and Recreation, 1am rolls around and I am convinced there are bad guys lurking into my yard from the lane. So instead of looking at pins I stalk around the house and re-check locks until I realize that I have become the prowler.

    ReplyDelete
  28. Goodness gracious, your posts & pictures make me laugh so much and I always look forward to them. I don't have 3 kids to wrangle before I get out the door, but I would still have had some choice words and a voice mail playback for that receptionist. My husband is deployed- I totally feel for your call weekends & truly appreciate how you tell it like it is. I've never heard anything good about residency from friends in medicine, and hope that you guys will catch a break soon. Hang in there!

    ReplyDelete
  29. The local Wendy's just got one of the fancy pop mix machines. I'm hooked vanilla diet coke, vanilla cherry diet coke, ginger ale with flavorings.

    I'm glad that I don't have problem sleeping without hubby. I'm on deployment 3. I know plenty of wives that have problem. I don't have an answer just a sympathetic ear.

    ReplyDelete
  30. The local Wendy's just got one of the fancy pop mix machines. I'm hooked vanilla diet coke, vanilla cherry diet coke, ginger ale with flavorings.

    I'm glad that I don't have problem sleeping without hubby. I'm on deployment 3. I know plenty of wives that have problem. I don't have an answer just a sympathetic ear.

    ReplyDelete
  31. I am just becoming aware of on call schedule... Joel doesn't have nights yet, but it's horrible and I hate it. YOur blog is therapy for me and prepares for the future for sure!

    ReplyDelete
  32. I'm always a little nuts after ONE weekend on-call, never mind three! Joy of private practice I guess...it does go by quick...I'll second the notion for a security system. I never slept better. You can get cheaper ones than ADT.
    My drive-thru of choice is Dunkin Donuts- ice tea, but my girls are old enough to yell for donuts and luckily they are so quick there I say nope and literally "drive through" so fast.
    We are here to listen, so bitch away when you need to!

    ReplyDelete
  33. I swore up and down that Lucy would NOT wear only pink. My best friend even bought her a little boy onesie just to make me feel better. And still, Lu's closet is 99% pink. I'm sure once I start buying her clothes (Grandma's have that covered for the first three months currently), Ryan will have the same comments. Plaid allllll the way!

    ReplyDelete
  34. I love reading your blog! My sister, Brittany, over at The Lilyfield said I had to follow you because we were a like. My husband is on a military scholarship for medical school, and started 3rd year this week. Next week he begins rotations. Reading your blog scares me sometimes but comforts me knowing I'm not alone.

    ReplyDelete
  35. Not sure if this was the post where you talked about your diet Coke drive through kick, but I feel like it was somewhere around here. My personal favorite is Sonic diet Coke w/ vanilla, however, I saw on Pinterest the other day about "Dirty Diet Coke"... 2 T of that Torani coconut syrup, 1/2 lime squeezed over ice, then pour the diet Coke on top. As soon as I get a chance to get the coconut syrup, I'm doing it. In case you like that sort of thing and want to mix up the vice at home like I do because I get tired of putting everyone in their car seats.

    ReplyDelete
  36. WOW. Bash is suddenly grown. I guess because Theo is The Baby now? In any case, Bash looked like a baby for so long and now he's a KID. Still tres adorable, as is Julia, but they are totally pushing prep school.

    When vodka (or rather, beer/tequila) tells me I can dance? HE'S TOTALLY TELLING THE TRUTH. Just sayin.

    ReplyDelete
  37. WOW. Bash is suddenly grown. I guess because Theo is The Baby now? In any case, Bash looked like a baby for so long and now he's a KID. Still tres adorable, as is Julia, but they are totally pushing prep school.

    When vodka (or rather, beer/tequila) tells me I can dance? HE'S TOTALLY TELLING THE TRUTH. Just sayin.

    ReplyDelete